Wednesday, February 24, 2010

The Blackest Night #7 - Synopsis - Review

Nekron's heralds all carry the guardians towards Nekron, Nekron says that the guardians are the oldest living beings in the universe thus making their connection to the "white light" stronger than any other, yet they bury it deep inside. Nekron holds a guardian and asks him why do they protect the universe if they don't live, calling the guardian "creature". The Guardian stutters that he doesn't remember.

The coloured lantern corps team of the main lantern representatives and their deputies show up. Sinestro notes that their beams are useless against Nekron and that Nekron's enjoying it.

Hal mentions to Ray that this isn't a bad guy like the ones they've fought day to day, it isn't personal for him.

Black Hand says it is for him as he wraps everyone down in black webbing. he says that all his life he's seen others more beautiful and blessed but in death they are all equal. All silent and cold.

A downed Atrocitus asks Saint Walker if he still believes All will be well and Saint Walker says that he does and that deep inside he knows that he (atrocitus) does too. Then Black Hand says that he remembers Atrocitus and Atrocitus says he remembers too and that he was the doorway to the black that he tried to end a long time ago. Black Hand puts his arm into Atrocitus' chest asking where is his heart, Hal Jordan tells him his ring is his heart and Black hand grabs Hal with dead hands that rise from the ground and hold him. Black hand says that Hal had extra time he didn't earn and that inevitably everything dies, and that he is stopping people suffering miserable deaths.

Scarecrow comes in stabbing Black hand with a pitchfork construct, that he feels alive and wants to hear screams. As Scarecrow fights Black Hand by himself, Luthor calls him out, then Wonder Woman tells him that this is his chance to do some good, Barry says to "think of it this way, if you don't join in now you won't have a world left to feed your oversized ego". Scarecrow screams "THIS IS MY MOMENT!". Lex's eyes light with the symbol of Avarice and he says "No. It's mine." and he attacks Scarecrow. The Indigo 1 says that he's succumbed to the orange light. Luthor goes insane and attacks everyone wanting Crane's ring and manages to take it off him and put it on himself. Then he wants everyone's rings attacking everyone, then flies at Mera trying to take her ring.

In Space, John Stewart is being pursued by billions, yes billions of Black Lanterns. He tries to call to anyone until a Black Lantern Airwave says that he's been screwing up the signals. And that in space only they can hear him scream. All the Black Lanterns turn around as their rings say that "emotional spectrum detonation imminent".

next page. Double Page Splash of every Lantern Corps, with Guy dead centre. As they all have seemed to come in at the same time, a huge battle erupts particularly with the red lanterns attacking everyone. Airwave tries to take Guy's heart until Kilowog severes his connection to the black.

Then all their rings receive the same message manipulated via their rings. The message states that they are to extend the temporary alliance since the situation is as desperate as the situation prophesized. Guy Gardner says "unite as one corps? keep dreaming" then an Indigo Lantern says that the green lanterns corps as a solo unit will be overcome with over three billions black lanterns. and if they team up they will only be overcome with over two billion.

On Earth, The new Dove, shows up severing all connections around her. Dove says that she feels something flowing through her and if she can destroy the black lanterns with a touch then maybe she can damage their power source.

Then lightning or some power hits dove. And a voice yells "NEKRON." And the black lantern battery has a figure trying to get out of the battery yelling "LET ME OUT."

As the coloured corps try to stop Luthor, nekron holds a guardian and asks him for any final words. The injured and broken Guardian struggles to mutter the words "Long live the cor--" until Nekron slits his throat.

Nekron hands the guardian to Black Hand who puts his arm into his chest and rips out his entrails, revealed to be multicolored like the various corps. Then he says "death to us all". Black Hand puts the entrails on the ground and an unknown symbol appears around it.

A gagged Luthor attacked by Wonder Woman and Atrocitus says that the truth is he really wants to be Superman.

Nekron stands over the dead open chested Guardian's corpse and says "Death to you all."

Hal asks Ganthet what is Nekorn doing. Ganthet says he's murdered one of the guardians and has begun to make contact. Sinestro asks "contact with what".

Then Nekron says "Trespasser." Strikes his scythe down and says "RISE". A blinding flashing light and then Geoff Johns shows he's going all crazy Alan Moore, Stan Lee cosmic with this new creation.

A giant skinny white figure with wings in a coccoon emerges. Hal just looks in shock.

Nekron lifts his scythe and says that he wants all their lives. "INVADERS".

Nekron strikes the creature which yells. As he strikes the creature, everyone feels pain except Black Hands.

Hal asks what it is. Ganthet says it's "The Entity." "The living light bestowed upon this universe that triggered existence itself".

Ganthet says in shame that the guardians may be the oldest living beings but life did not begin on Oa, but on Earth. They buried that fact to keep the Entity protected.

Sinestro gets angry saying just like they buried parallax or the sector 666 massacre. Ganthet says they could not draw attention to Earth and they tried to keep humans from the green lantern corps. Sinestro says "until Abin Sur died" and that he knew all of this and thats why he came to "this wretched world" Sinestro attacks Ganthet saying that they destroyed Abin Sur to protect their lies. And they let the universe believe life originated on oa to justify their Authority. Sinestro says that now he will justify his authority.

Nekron strikes the Entity again. With life drawn all around him, suffering.

Hal says they all feel the pain because they are all connected and every living thing is dying. Barry asks why isn't it fighting back. Hal says that The Entity is like Parallax and Ion, a living power. Nekron dug it up for them. Hal flies towards it saying "It just needs a PILOT."

A giant Sinestro construct stops Hal in his path telling him he had his chance with Parallax. "This is my duty!" Sinestro flies towards the entity saying that this is the reason he is alive, and he is the one that will lead them out of the blackest night. Sinestro grabs a hold of the entity, a peacul looking alien type creature, demanding it's power.

Sinestro's eyes light up with the white light symbol, similar to the Black Lantern symbol but with many thin lines on the top. Sinestro yells that he will finally prove to the universe...

"I am the greatest lantern of them all"

Enter Destiny. Enter Double page portrait splash. Enter White Lantern Sinestro.

In case you're wondering what the white ring/entity power is saying "Thaal Sinestro" "Destiny awaits".

Epic issue, though the whole Abin Sur thing still makes no sense. So Abin Sur came to earth and knew all about the entity....ok...but what then? What was his plan. Did he want it? Did the guardians sabotage Atrocitus so he could kill Sinestro? How did they know it would work? Ahhhh Alan Moore's yellow fog story is much better.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

The Blackest Night #5 - Ultra Mega Super Epic Explosive Spoiler!!! ....and Review

Read Green Lantern #48 before The Blackest Night #5 or else it won't make much sense.

ohh yeah.


The issues pretty good too. Some art/rushed coloring problems, but pretty tight and finally involving Green Lanterns in a Green Lantern story(pretty much proving everything I said about Didio seeing a $ opportunity to turn this into a DC wide crossover true - which happened, and did take away from the story).

Still not as good or tight as Sinestro Corps War.

Ohh yeah and Nekron has been keeping the heroes from really dying, he's the one who's been resurrecting them.


The Issue - Synopsis

Right after Green Lantern #48 where all the corps leaders join together. They all decide to go fight Nekron. They all power up with their oaths in a cool spread(has Indigo-1's oath which is in that nok nok language and mentions abin sur) but larfleeze has no oath and he keeps wanting promises for things in exchange for joining the Colored Corps. Atrocitus wants to kill him and Sinestro suggests they kill him and go get whoever the ring goes to next. Hal just pushes Larfleeze's face into his power battery charging him up to %100,000

- On Earth Barry runs at Nekron who tells him that his "death was the first, your rebirth will be the last". Black Hand attacks Barry and Bruce's skull makes a sound causing Barry to go "bruce?"

-Wally comes out of nowhere helping Barry. Barry asks if he's the only one coming and Wally says that they don't have a flash corps to back them up but they have plenty of friends - showing a page of DC heroes including Wonder Woman and Superman.

In Manhattan Ray/atom is trying to stop the black ring from ressurecting Damage. Jean says no one believed in him until Ray came along. Then Mera has water smash Jean. jean then grabs Ray and Mera and they shrink and dissapear into Damage's Black ring.

- Superman and Conner are destroying all the black lantern coast city civilians when Kid Flash comes running telling them that they found out the white light of Dove is destroying all the black lanterns and that the titans are bringing her in. but the bad news is that donna troy was bitten. The flash's all run at nekron and past him and try to rescue the Guardians from their goo chains saying that they might not have green lanterns but they might have one better until -

- Scar shows up and slashes one of the flashes(i can't tell who). she is about to consume Wally when the colored corps show up all shooting their rings at Scar in an awesome double page spread.

- Larfleeze tries to keep Scar because he wants his own guardian, but Scar ensnares him until the colored corps and Ganthet and Sayd destroy her.

- The colored corps fly at the black power battery with indigo-1 saying that they need to recrate the white light which created life, which is the antithesis of the death powering the black lanterns.

- the colored lanterns all shoot their rings at the power battery and black hand mentions that the guardian's ultimate lie is about to be exposed as a solitary black ring flies from the black power battery. It flies past everyone as the colored corps see that their shooting is doing nothing.

- Black hand holds up Bruce Wayne's skull and says that their shooting is actually making Nekron stronger. Then....

- "Bruce Wayne of Earth"

- A double page spread of BLACK LANTERN BATMAN!

- everyone is in shock and a black lantern ring says "emotional tether registered", obviously engaging all the heroes with a zombie Bruce Wayne.

- Nekron tells all the resurrected heroes that they died and came back but they don't know why, he was the one stopping them from everlasting death, he allowed their resurrections. And that they will help him expose the guardians greatest secret and return the universe to a place of quiet, dark order.

- A bunch of rings fly out of Black Lantern Bruce Wayne and attach themselves to Wonder Woman, Superman, Green Arrow, Animal Man, Tora, Conner, Kid Flash.

- Nekron - "DIE!"

- The heroes start dying as Barry runs. Hal ensnares bruce then Nekron says that Bruce Wayne has served his purpose and he can return to rest. Then connection severed as batman explodes.

- Double Page spread of the dead heroes, but not zombified. Nekron says "the light awaits us" just as Hal Jordan is trying to stop a black lantern ring attaching to him and Barry is outrunning one.

next issue "DIE!"

Wednesday, September 16, 2009


I refuse to call it Blackest Night, it's THE BLACKEST NIGHT. Fuck you Didio.


- The new Firestorm pair of Jason and Gen are at Columbia U and Jason wants to study formulas for Firestorm whilst Gen wants to go to the movies but Jason is really putting everything off because he has seen her thoughts which involve marriage and children. He tells her he's not ready and the JLA beeper goes off.

- Back in Gotham. Hal and Barry are fighting the Zombie JLA. Kendra is telling Carter to make Hal use willpower because it gets her hot. Ralph tries to elicit an emotion in Barry getting Rage. The dead Ronnie Raymond Firestorm berates Barry for being like Professor Stein - a boring dull dude. Barry Manages to get Ronnie's finger and tries to pull the black ring off. He yanks it and Firestorm yanks back but the ring is bonded to him. Barry tells Hal the rings are rooted like plants in the ground. Out of nowhere The Atom comes out of Hawkman's black ring, all beaten and bruised with a torn costume. He tells them that the rings have the same porous structure as bones or 'dark matter' the unseen skeletal anatomy of the universe.

- at JLA headquarters, Firestorm(the normal one) walks in creeped out and sees the Black Lantern attacks around the world on a monitor. He is then pinned against the wall by Mera. She tells them to calm down and stay focused and centred, to not give out emotion. It is the way she was able to escape and the way they seem to not be able to track her.

- Hal and Barry try to escape with Ray but Ralph grabs Hal and then holds Ray, breaking him down emotionally, he sees compassion in Ray. Ray says what happens was an accident. Sue Dibny tells him that she knew what she was doing as she brough along a flamethrower. As Sue is about to put her hand through Ray's chest....A FEMALE INDIGO LANTERN JUMP KICKS SUE DIBNY LIKE A FUCKING BADASS! Putting her staff through her fucking chest! She looks angry and then slices Sue in half with her staff. Then this awesome Shaman Indigo Lantern jumps on Ralph and puts his staff through Ralphs's face. They manage to push away the black lanterns and then the Indigo Lantern summons the power of will and the end of her staff glows green and she shoots a ring and shatters the hand with the black ring saying "Connection Severed". The will from her staff shatters Ralph, then it does the same to Sue but not before she tells Ray to feel bad for her. Then the Indigo Lanterns teleport Hal, Barry and Ray out of there to JLA headquarters.

- At JLA headquarters. Ray is broken but the Indigo Lantern talks to him in English, comforting him, seeing the compassion in him and that their light will heal him. Firestorm asks if they are the purple lanterns. The Indigo lantern tells them that they discard names and individuality but she can be reffered to as Indigo-1 and that she is the chosen leader of the Indigo Tribe. They ask her what's going on and to start at the beginning.

- In a double page spread she recounts everything. First there was darkness and then there was light, for seven hundred years there was nothing but WHITE LIGHT. Then the darkness fought back and the light splintered. Every sentient being born from the light contributes to the spectrum. Everybody's state of being adds to the light and it can collected and harnessed. She then explains all the corps, who they are and what they do. She also explains that all the Corps homeworlds are under attack. Indigo-1 can also hear Gen who asks why do they attack Earth and she says she believes it's because they have halted so many threats across the universe. She says the Black Lanterns are not the invaders in this war and that 'we' are the invaders. They are the tresspassers but they bring goodness. The guys all speculate that the black lanterns aren't really them(the people who they are), Ray thinks maybe the dead aren't wearing the rings, but the rings are wearing the dead. Indigo-1 says they feed off emotion. Ray says she can stop them since she channeled Hal's ring. She says that Green light reinforced with another will neutralize the rings and leave them to conventional damage. Once destroyed the ring initiates a feedback which renders the black lantern inert. The more shades of the emotional spectrum shining together, the stronger the light. She explains that it is the reason she went to Hal, The seven corps can replicate the 'white light of creation'(white lantern ehh) and that together they will be capable of locating the source of the black rings and destroying it. She mentions he has personal connections to the most powerful members of all the corps such as Carol. She explains what's happening to her on Zamaron. And like the cocky dude he is, tries to go straight away without thinking. but Barry holds him down, telling him they need him. Barry tells him he has a thick skull and after everything he's been through, he still hasn't learnt anything, he still flies off hal cocked. They both berate how they were and how they are now until Hal sees Barry is right and they should regroup with the other big guns like Clark and Diana and Wally and Jay and then the ZOMBIE JLA bursts through. However the Indigo Lanterns grab Hal and teleport him against his will, leaving the others to whatever fate.

- The Zombie Firestorm shuts them all in. and he goes straight for normal firestorm and seperates Jason and Gen into their physical forms. He then grabs Gen by the throat and as Jason tells him to leave her alone he mends Jason to him as his other half of his mind. He starts breaking down jason as he has Gen in his hands against a wall and he can see everything Ronnie can see, such as the yellow aura of fear around her. He starts brekaing him down saying he stole the matrix from him to get in her pants. Jason tries to stop him, screaming at him but nothing. Ronnie asks what the formula for table salt is and then mentions ghosbusters and how the guys couldn't keep a clear head. Of course he now knows the formula. He starts turning her into table salt all whilst saying how the life she wanted with her boyfriend will never happen, Jason tries to scream but she can't hear him. Jason screams that he does want a future together and he does love her. But it's too late, he turned her into solidified salt and the black power level raises and Ronnie punches his hand through to grab her heart.

- As Mera, Barry and Ray fight the Zombie JLA, more Black Rings come in. The solidified Gen breaks down and the power levels keep increasing whilst Ronnie tells Jason he will break down everything he's got until there's nothing. For some reason Jason is like a never ending battery as the power levels keep rising. The black rings fly towards the JLA morgue to people like Maxwell Lord, Alexander Luthor of Earth 3. They Rise and then in the last page. Zombified Maxwell Lord with the rope around his neck, Alexander Luthor, Copperhead, Dr Light and more.

Next: Power Levels 100%

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Green Lantern #44, Tales of the Corps #2, Legion of 3 Worlds #5 - First Reviews


The "second" part of The Blackest Night has arrived in my hands. Taking the story point from the meeting between Hal, Barry and a certain dead Jonn Jonz' aka The Martian Manhunter at the grave of Bruce Wayne.

Basically Jonn is trying to kill them, saying they should both be dead. Jonn fights them but Barry manages to save both he and Hal by running away. Hal tries to communicate with Salaak to warn them of an unidentified power ring but communications are down. Jonn brings down the building Hal and Barry are in, telling them that he's as strong as Superman.

On Oa, A guardian asks Scar why she is doing it whilst they are all on the walls in Black goo like the humans in Alien/Aliens. She says that she is restoring order to the universe and that the manhunters failed, the Green Lanterns failed and there is need for a new army. That chaos will always reign aslong as emotion is made by sentient beings. Yes. Total annhihilation of sentient beings. She says that the black lanterns are collecting hearts made of splintered light and soon it will be HIS turn to rise. She says this as Black Lanterns descend on all the Lantern Corps worlds and all the Lantern Corps are fighting.

One thing is confirmed. Black Lanterns can see the emotional Spectrum and see which person carries which emotion. In the case of Hal and Barry, it's a beautiful panel showing Hal as a green light and Barry as a BLUE Light. Another thing is that the Black Lanterns are not mindless, they seem to be all the negative emotions in their lives.

Jonn terrorizes both Hal and Barry but especially Barry, Barry fights back physically trying to reach down inside of Jonn telling him that they were both cops and used to talk shop, that Jonn was fascinated by Law and Justice. Barry goes all out at Jonn but not realizing that he's actually fighting Hal. I'm not sure if Black Lanterns can mess with people's minds or if it's just Jonn's telepathy. As far as the negative emotions things. Jonn starts talking about justice and how there was no justice for his wife and kid or his murderer and that Justice is dead. So the Black Lanterns also seem to be negative, death in mentallity, morose in thought. Jonn throws Hal into the air against the backdrop of the bat signal whilst he throws Barry into a sewer.

On Xanshi, John is reflecting over his recent meeting with fatality about accepting forgiveness, he tells himself that he's trying - when Black Rings fly towards him. The Dead of Xanshi shall rise.

Honestly, the big guy, the one behind everything. I am calling it now, though I called it a few months ago - Krona.

Doug Mahnke is a capable artist, he is a good choice to take over the now legendary reigns of Ivan Reis. He's grown a lot as an artist over these past 2-3 years, his stuff on Superman Beyond 3D was some of the best stuff in recent times. His Hal Jordan is quite brilliant, Iconic. I'm looking forward to what he does during The Blackest Night and beyond.


There isn't much happening in this issue. There are origins for Bleez - the female Red Lantern with wings and Blume the Godhead - Orange Lantern. Blume is that big thing that eats everyone that ends up replicating their identities for Larfleeze to use as constructs. The story everyone will want from this is how Carol became a Star Sapphire again and honestly you won't expect what you read. Apart from these stories it's info pages showing the corps like Blackest Night #0. Red Lanterns, Agent Orange and Star Sapphires

Bleez was once the most beautiful woman across 'seven' sectors of the universe. She came from a planet called Havania which is second to Odym(the Blue Lantern home planet) in it's beauty. Bleez is courted from all around the universe. Dudes basically rock up and are like "yo, want to get married" she's like "fuck off idiot!" much to the annoyance of her mother who wants grandchildren, much like Raymond's mother on TV. Bleez has a frog who is her assistant who is real nice but really he's a slave and she makes him feel that way, she isn't mean but does remind him he's a slave. The frog dude tells her she has another suitor but Bleez is not interested because guys only want to bang her and are interested in the real thing. Curiously, I find it odd that she looks like Megan Fox. But with wings and like a pale blue skin. Pale blue skinned, winged Megan Fox. I just made a shitload of cunts blow their loads. Anyway, frog dude tells her that her mother wants her to meet this new dude who is 'tall' and that he cannot argue. She tells him that he cannot argue because he is a slave and he is not free. She flies off to the Narnia castle where she meets her mother who tells her that she has a suitor who wields a great power and who is 'tall', Bleez is not interested, but the dude comes out and it's a Sinestro Corps Soldier, he kills the mother and takes Bleez as a prisoner on Ranx the sentient city. Bleez is basically made to be a sex slave for Sinestro Corps soldiers. The sinestro soldier taunts her because on her world she would spit on him because he couldn't fly but now he can and he breaks her wings. It all seems to be about to go like that Jodie Foster movie where she is done on a pinball machine but Ranx is attacked, presumably by Green Lanterns. Noting that she sees a hole in Ranx, she escapes and finally understands the meaning of freedom. The sinestro dude follows her and kisses her in space until a red ring selects her, she vomits that plasma stuff in his mouth, he burns. She turns into a Red Lantern and slits his throat. And they all lived happily ever after. Some nice drawings and a cool story, the Megan Fox Red Lantern splash is the panel from the story.

The Blume story is a trippy one by Peter Tomasi. That big head is some sort of god that goes around to planets and threatens the people with destroying the planet unless they feed him what they value most. He eats the valuables of an entire planet - gold, jewels, all that material stuff. And then spares the planet since they have nothing left anymore. He continues on until he gets to a planet and the people start offering them their babies since they are poor in resources but rich in spirt and their babies are their most precious things. Blume is pretty thrown out by this and thinks fair enough and takes the children. He starts to leave but then says how he has seen that "precious" is in the eye of a beholder and that he can be merciful. He then leaves the babies and leaves the planet, saying that sometimes a God has no use for some things. Then he makes it all the way to Sector 66 to the planet Okarra - homeworld of Agent Orange. He does the same thing. Threatens Larfleeze to give him everything he values. Larfleeze says the same thing. and has him consumed. He turns into a construct and is now a pat of Agent Orange and Larfleeze jumps on top of him and says "mine."

As for the Carol Ferris story, she's flying a plane the day before The Blackest Night begins. The ring enters the craft and chooses her, Carol is having none of it but expects it to take over her, except the ring just floats there, doing nothing. Carol doesn't get it and says "well?" and the ring says it is waiting for her acceptance. Then Carol goes on how she doesn't get it since every few months it comes out of nowhere and turns her into a psychopath who tries to kill her ex boyfriend. The ring says things are different now and stuff about love conquering all, that she has a hole in her heart and to let the ring fill it. Carol denies this. Then it goes on to show her life, her love of Hal, learning about loss with Hal's father and how her father never forgave himself.

Basically it shows how much her life has been of sacrifice, and how much she has sacrificed for love. That in the end she does love Hal Jordan. She is meant to lead the star sapphires in order to help the Green Lanterns during The Blackest Night. She sees a vision of the future war of light, looks like Hal, Sinesto and Arkillo being attacked by Red Lanterns above a cemetary. The ring tells her she is willing to sacrifice anything to help true love and her love is threatened. She is manipulated and gives in because she loves Hal and wants to help him. Then it's revealed it was Queen Aga'po talking to her on Zamoron whilst an aide informs her the Sinestro Corps is on their way. But the queen says to let them come since love conquers all.

Great story for how Carol became a Star Sapphire again but interesting to note she seems like she'll be the Ion/Parallax of the Star Sapphires.

At the end of the issue there's a two page section on the Lantern symbols by Ethan Van Sciver who designed them. He goes into detail on each one, the origins, design style etc.


Well it finally comes to an end. The Final Crisis mini series that has nothing to do with Final Crisis. Honestly Didio, just trying to siphon money out of a shitty event by slapping the name on it is just pathetic. Anyway, the issue is here, things are meant to be resolved, a cool story in the process is meant to happen and so far Johns has done this.

The delays have been irrelevant, this has been for the most part a self contained story, self contained to Legion stories. I'm not the most knowledgable guy in Legion-lore. But I know the jist, all the continuity fuck ups and reboots over the years(this is DC, it's normal) haven't really done much for Legion but of course Johns comes in and rescues it all. Though does something I don't like.

The issue itself starts with what we knew before, the time trapper is an older superboy prime. They all fight, all the legions. Superboy (Conner) and some of the legion fight Prime on Earth, some of the legion fight Mordru in Metropolis, and the Cosmic Boy, Saturn Girl, Lightning Lad and Superman fight time trapper/prime at the end of time. All the reboots and time travel has made the time trapper unkillable, he cannot be killed from creation. Apparently he knows the future too, and the war they've been fighting - the legion lose. However a scar from Conner on Superboy Prime creates itself on the time trapper meaning time is not set. Somehow the 3 legion at the end of time summon a shitload of legionnaires, including some old continuity ones. They all use their power on time trapper/prime who ends up knocked out. The 3 legionnaires see their past silver age self and tell them to never quit. Supes and the legionnaires take Time trapper/prime back to Earth in front of Superboy Prime. Both are shocked and superboy primer being a child starts arguing with time trapper/prime because he wouldn't wear a beard in the future, this causes Superboy-Prime to punch tim trapper, erasing both. The coolest thing about this. A four panel sequence of Superboy Prime being undone First a normal panel of his face, then just inked as a comic drawing, then just pencilled, till finally being a sketch. Metatext at it's most amazing.

Supes is glad to see Conner. Then back on Earth Prime, Superboy-Prime ends up in front of his house. He runs in happy only to see Lori run away in fear and his parents asking if he did 'this'. His dad - no shit- proceeds to hold up a copy of LEGION OF 3 WORLDS #5 the same fucking issue I had in my hands. He lives in a post crisis modern Earth Prime where they have the same comics. His parents tell him they know everything his been up to - one the dinner table - copies of Legion of 3 Worlds, Infinite Crisis #4 and FUCKING Green Lantern #25 the final Sinestro Corps War issue. Amazing.

Back to the legion - they all repair earth and then Brainiac the Action Comics one reveals the the Mark Waid/Threeboot Legion is from Earth Prime. How this makes sense I don't know, I liked the idea of Superboy being the only person with powers, but then for the future to have a Legion is just weird. Should have been another Earth Johns. Makes the past irrelevant. Now suddenly Earth Prime isn't so special anymore.

Sodam Yat becomes the new moral compass for Green Lantern rings and sends them out across the universe, restarting the Green Lantern Corps. The final panel for Green Lantern? "Scanning Space Sector 2814" "Sentient found".

The legions all go their seperate ways into different universes. The 90's Legion will travel the multiverse, whilst the Threeboot/Waid Legion will go back to Earth Prime.

Superman takes Conner and Bart back to Titans Tower much to the happiness of everyone.

Then it cuts to Superboy-Prime asking for a grilled cheese sandwich whilst being down in the basement reading the same issue we're reading.(the metatext comes full circle huh? he was always the angry silver age fanboy).

Next page has him reading the page before, he throws it at the reader and then sits down at his computer saying that they think he's powerless and he can't do anything from where he is. He goes on the DC Universe Forum, no shit, the one I actually go on. And he says he'll always survive. maybe a written metatext of the reader keeping him around by talking about him?

I don't know but the whole DC comics thing with the modern comics is genius and then to go on this thread on this forum!

Full Scan

Semi Full Scan.

The Real forum

Superboy-Prime uses a Mac. I always knew he was a cunt.

The Blackest Night #1 - Review, Musings, Thoughts, Death.


So it's here. THE BLACKEST NIGHT has come. The most anticipated comic event that I can remember has arrived with a grasp at your heart. The third part in Geoff Johns' Trilogy that is interwoven in his epic saga doesn't disappoint. The Blackest Night is Geoff Johns' Return of the King(Ok he said Return of the Jedi, but Return of the Jedi is a disappointment), Rebirth was Star Wars, the mighty Sinestro Corps War was his Empire Strikes Back and The Blackest Night might have been the unmade Return of the Jedi directed by Spielberg.

I had a few issues to catch up to before The Blackest Night began, which is a shame since I wanted to be the first reviewer on the event I have been going apeshit over for 2 years. 2 years. Almost 2 years since we saw that brutal teaser at the end of Green Lantern #25 that was better than most movie teasers. The Teaser that showed Black Rings, and that The Dead Shall Rise.

Everyone knows I'm a Green Lantern fan. I would promote Sinestro Corps War on aintitcool whenever I could till I lost my password. Ha. Sinestro Corps War is the greatest superhero story ever written. End of Story. It's the best Star Wars story since Empire Strikes Back. Just epic, adventurous, grandiose, fun, heroic, magical. Since it ended and everyone has been jerking off in anticipation of The Blackest Night we've gotten brilliant issues leading up to it within Green Lantern and Green Lantern Corps. The War of Light started, the different Corps rose.

It's all exciting, the little differences in all the corps, how they function, how they come to be. How Johns manages to bring old continuity into it (the Manhunters and Sector 666). Ahh, Green Lantern has been the best book of the decade. It's just a joy reading. In regards to The Blackest Night, what I gathered from reading over the past 2 years is that a War of Light would erupt between the various Corps and then the Black Lantern Corps would come out of nowhere and fuck them all up. Since then the main theories - which seem that they might come true - are that the Green Lantern Corps and the Sinestro Corps will have to team up, that the Guardians will get what has been coming to them and that Hal will become a White Lantern. Hal being exposed to virtually all the Corps seems to ascertain that fact.
The Blackest Night falls from the skies...
...the darkness grows as all light dies...
...we crave your hearts and your demise... my Black Hand--The Dead Shall Rise!
What an oath. Eerie. I thought it would have started with "In Blackest Day, In Blackest Night" and gone from there, but it's still a great oath.

By the start of the issue itself. The Black Hand has killed himself and made a Black Lantern, but not just any Black Lantern, but their herald and powerful wild card - an equivalent to Ion from the Green Lantern Corps and Parallax from the Sinestro Corps. Scar, that cuntish little Guardian who was scarred by the Anti Monitor has been playing everyone all along and set up the coming of The Blackest Night.

It's a worldwide memorial day for fallen superheroes and soldiers, doctors etc, originally the day of mourning for the death of Superman. A fitting day for The Blackest Night. Superheroes everywhere are mourning other heroes - Aquaman, Ted Kord, Ronnie Raymond etc - Alfred goes to see Bruce Wayne's grave when he realizes it's been broken into and his skull has been stolen. What I love about this issue is the multiple storypoints, everything creeping slowly, the sense of death coming. Everything is building, the various memorial gatherings, juxtaposed with the uncertainty on Oa where the armoured shell protecting the planet is shattered and now Oa is exposed. Basically Alfred going nuts to Hal and Barry about Bruce's missing skull kicks things into gear. It goes to the Guardians realizing they have failed, that Ganthet was right all the way back in Sinestro Corps that The Blackest Night cannot be prevented, it can only be confronted. This is shown by the Guardians observing the various corps in battle across different sectors of the universe. Star Sapphires engaged against the Sinestro Corps on Zamaron - Mongul doing his thing - the lost Lanterns on Ysmault fighting the Red Lanterns whilst trying to retrieved the body of Laira(you know where this is going) and the Blue Lanterns engaged against Agent Orange(which if you don't know, Blue Lanterns might be the most powerful of the many corps, but they're useless without a Green Lantern nearby). The guardians accept their failure and issue a code black to call back all Green Lanterns back to Oa, no doubt to set up a plan and fuck up shit. But Johns writes these event comics like a big blockbuster movie and the moment that Scar says that they will never receive their call for help because it will never be made, you can just imagine it as a movie. That's where everything goes to shit and whilst it's towards the end of the comic, the set up is so perfect that the pay off is excellent, especially knowing this has just started. That feeling of being let down after Final Crisis #1 and saying "ahh, it's just the setup, it will pick up next issue" - not here. It's started. And it's started with a low drone of death.

The chaos of the Green Lanterns not knowing what to do after the breakdown of Oa, no explosions, they're just standing there, no orders, not knowing what's going on, what to do etc. And then the black rings fly by them into the Green Lantern crypt. The guardians getting owned by Scar and harvested like the humans in Alien/Aliens by the xenomorphs. Then that two page spread of the Black Rings flying all across and giving rise to the dead whilst Hal and Barry check out Bruce's grave. Then that double page spread. The excellent reactions of Salaak, Kilowog, Kyle and Guy who can't believe their eyes with Guy mouthing "what the fuck?" as the Black Lanterns "Rise" before them. Fucked up, mummified, death entrenched fallen Lanterns.

To see Ralph and Sue Dibny turned to perverted Black Lanterns is pretty shocking, sure Identity Crisis had the whole thing of breaking apart the most loving couple in the DCU thing, but here to turn them into Black Lanterns who kill and rip out the hearts of Hawkman and Hawkgirl(first they smash Hawkman's face - including leaving the side of his face ripped open - brutal). To have that loving couple become...those things. I don't think it's fucked up from Johns, just that this couple who were the loving couple of the DCU, the heart if you will, being brought back in death just shows how broken everything is.

What's excellent and scary about this title is that superheroes are not just facing death, but real fear, confronting grief, which may be the worst thing one can feel. Knowing that Kyle will have to face Jade, a zombified Jade no less will sure be interesting. And if Hal has to face his ultimate fear and hero - his father. Forget it. What would you feel in such a moment.

The stakes are really high in this, the tension, that sense of dread that Final Crisis was missing is in here. In Sinestro Corps, the tension came from the fact Green Lanterns couldn't kill, you kept thinking "holy shit, what are they gonna do? They're fucked!". But the Guardians were all right, they knew shit was fucked but they had it under control. Here, the Guardians are taken out. I have a feeling this event will leave a real lasting effect on the DCU. All I can say is I'm not disappointed, I'm blown away. Hopefully I will continue to be blown away.

And I don't know if I'm mistaken but did bzzd the fly lantern actually die? I don't remember. Apparently it was Green Lantern Corps #26, which was a while ago. He was awesome. The little dude with the willpower of a planet....And now he's a Black Lantern.

Also I like what I will christen "Hamlet Black Hand", that final page with Black Hand holding Bruce's skull(in effect holding the skull of the ultimate brutal hero, he holds it in his hands) over the bodies of Hawkman and Hawkgirl. The Shakespearean-esque character of Black Hand, and the visual style - well that just adds to it.

As for the visual side -

Ivan Reis is a genius. He is one of the best storytellers in comics. You can be a great artist but being a great storyteller can get you that much more involved in what are surely some of the best comic stories ever written. This guy is incredible. That double page spread of Salaak, Kilowog, Kyle and Guy seeing the Black Lanterns is simple but so effective. The first page of Hamlet Black Hand in front of Bruce Wayne's grave, the detail. Incredible. The 00's in comics will be marked by the genius of Ivan Reis amongst other guys like Alex Maleev and Bryan Hitch - their artwork will be remembered as part of this decade. That double page spread of Hal showing Barry all the fallen Heroes - beautiful.

I still have problems with the title. I don't like "Blackest Night", I like "The Blackest Night", like it was originally called. Like it had in the teaser. It sounds more epic, this sounds like Didio just being a dumb cunt. Sorry Didio, but "The Lord of the Rings" sounds epic as does "The Blackest Night", it was called THE BLACKEST NIGHT continuously throughout Sinestro Corps. So explain it to me why it's now called just "blackest night". It's a little thing but it makes a big difference.

And I still have problems with Didio. We all know that The Blackest Night was never meant to be a miniseries, it was always purely a story going to be told within the pages of Green Lantern. Sinestro Corps War was never marketed properly, it was a word of mouth hit(DC was too busy promoting Countdown - fuck me - worst comic series of past 20 years?). Didio never realized what he had, and this is confirmed in the sales results report on CBR detailing Sinestro Corps War special. Once Didio realized how much everyone liked it, it was "ahh Green Lantern this, Green Lantern that ahh". So how did I know he was going to meddle with it. Once he knew that there were people jerking off in anticipation to THE BLACKEST NIGHT, he turned it into a mini series, showing the whole DCU, never mind that it's a Green Lantern thing. He exploited it, all cash, turned it into a mini series so anyone could get into it. He changed the name to "Blackest Night". It's business sure, but it pisses me off. Now Johns has to cater to the DCU rather than it being just purely a Green Lantern story. It's great, no doubt, but that's thanks to Johns. I still wonder however, if Didio cared in the first place, whether we'd see this epic saga just in the pages of Green Lantern. And what that story will be. As long as it stays mainly with the Green Lanterns then all is ok.

But really, he just doesn't get it, does he? If the reason everyone was excited was because it was good then why not just let Johns do his own thing? Why would you fuck it up when people were excited about the story, but nooooo you just had to exploit it huh? Ahh end of Didio rant.

Yes. It's better than Final Crisis #1.

In Blackest Night...

Wednesday, January 28, 2009


Written by Grant Morrison
Art by Doug Mahnke
DCU Rape by Dan Didio

Boy, are you fucks going to be pissed.

Superficially - no answers, more questions, more confusion.

First off so people read this. It's important.
Didio. It's called THE BLACKEST NIGHT, not BLACKEST NIGHT. Sounds more epic that way. People have been calling it The Blackest Night for months now, it's in the last fucking page of Sinestro Corps War, it's been called The Blackest Night on message boards everywhere, on wikipedia, stop being a fuck - call it 'The Blackest Night'. And it's a Green Lantern story, why do I want to see stories from non Green Lantern heroes in the main series. Fuck you are such a corporate cunt. You figure that you fucked up with Amazons Attack and that Sinestro Corps War was successful that you want to ride off the hype from it by milking it and changing it. Sinestro Corps War was successful and the hype for THE BLACKEST NIGHT is huge, so why not just do the same thing and let it be? Don't you realize that story is the reason it was successful? Why not let Geoff Johns do his thing, write a good story and even if you market it as a DC event, just let him do his thing. Because like a corporate cunt you want to milk it in the biggest possible way. This is why Marvel always beats you in everything. Fuck you.

Anyway, to Final Crisis # 7. What the fuck? You know, I didn't hate it. However I am completely confused and I wasn't one of those "I don't know what the fucks going on" dudes, but now I am. This issue isn't a mindfuck where you had to think like Superman Beyond was, this is more like "what the fuck?". There is no explanation on anything.

Seriously this is going to piss alot of people off, a few will drop DC Comics because of this issue and again many will call for Didio's head. But it will all be for the superficial things. Like the fact Darkseid ended up doing just about nothing in this series, that he really was not shown as the big ultra evil we were expecting, some people would say "but he controlled everybody and broke reality" but the scope wasn't there. He came and he went.

That sketchbook we all bought is fucking useless because just about none of the shit in there shows up. So all that lead time JG spent that some some apologists are using for the fact he was a slow penciller - is stupid because it was a waste of time.

And the multiverse itself is not really resolved, the future isn't set for the DCU or DCM.

This issue screams editorial incompetence. It should never have been called Crisis to begin with. This should of been something that Grant Morrison could do over time with a single artist. Maybe a graphic novel? Maybe DC didn't like his original plan and made him rewrite it.

The fucking epic "Heroes Die. Legends Live Forever" tagline makes absolutely no sense. Unless it means that Heroes always win, but either way, it's a letdown. I expected something that would set my balls on fire it would be that awesome. I really, really wish that original theory that the DCU was going to die and the main heroes were going to die and become New Gods from Earth 1 and the sidekicks would ascend to main hero status, whilst these New God heroes would live out of continuity. Nothing like that.

Final Crisis is just an exercise in Masturbation, Masturbating ideas, any ideas. That will have no effect on the DCU line, will be swept under the rug as if it never happened. It's not even going to be like people say, that Geoff Johns will have to come in and clean the mess. He doesn't have to. There are no changes, it won't make a difference. Everyone at DC and everyone who reads it will just forget about it, as if nothing happened and move on. Now I'm starting to think I just really didn't like this series, that it was a waste of money. All this talk of setting up the DC Universe for the next few years? Bullshit. No fucking difference.

Fucking hell, I was so excited for this, I imagined one of the most epic things ever. It's not as disappointing as Episode 1, but still disappointing. The fact that it won't make any difference within the DCU should of been enough to let DC do what Grant Morrison originally intended and just call it an Elseworlds book or something. They would of been better off releasing something good which means nothing than something shit that doesn't make any difference. Thinking like this is what makes Marvel take 50% of the retail market. Yes, they're smarter than you DC.

The art itself is mediocre. How? You say. If you remember my Superman Beyond #2 review, you'd note that I said Doug Mahnke is going to be a superstar, and I still believe that. His art in that issue was incredible. But here, rush job. Not his fault. But fuck you can see the difference, you can see he was put under pressure because the heads at DC don't know what the fuck is up, or that rumor about Didio fucking everything up cos of pussy is true. Whatever, it isn't the prettiest art. The detail isn't there. Some panels are pretty good, some are pretty bad, not Infinite Crisis #7 bad, but somewhere in that ballpark. And jamming so much into one comic, not allowing the story to flow. Stupid fucking idea. I guess I was right a year ago. Seven issues is too short. So to all those who said it will be enough, fuck you. You were wrong.

Ohh and the storytelling after reading it again - either I just don't get it, or it's bad storytelling. I think it's the latter. Sorry Mahnke.

Honestly, thank God it's over. Or thank Darkseid it's over.

Now here's a semi detailed Recap of the Issue - Plus a final page which will make you go...what?



Look at the previews on Newsamara for the first pages.

A black Superman who is president, obviously an allusion to Barack Obama meets Wonder Woman who has a Wonder Horn to be used at the end of everything. The horn opens up a hole which has The Question, Captain Marvel and Supermen of the multiverse in it, they're here to pick up the Superman of this Earth.

On the Watchtower (which reading again now seems to be fused with the Fortess of Solitude), someone narrates and talks about the crumbling world and how the Metal Men of Earth 44 went berzerk in their magnetic field, causing them to commit technocide. And that they wrecked the trophy room and mementoes were lost forever. The person narrating is Lois Lane and she says that they what remained into a rocket. Including the last edition of the Daily Planet with the story of Supoerheroes, the story of the people they loved. The story of the death of Batman and how a man had fatally wounded the God of Evil. And that someone, somewhere will read the story of the Final Crisis.

Some heroes on the watchtower fight the Metal Men of Earth 44. Until Luthor and Sivanna arrive with a weapon and disable them. The rocket is sent out of the watchtower with mementoes like the bat signal and Superman's cape.

Next page, Superman - holding Batman's body. "Darkseid." Darkseid says that Supes turned his back and he wrecked his world. That all his friends, enemies and lovers are him. One life that is Darkseid. In a freaky close up of Darkseid, he sayd "will you be the enemy of all existence then? What Irony that will be, son of Krypton. HAHAHAHAHA!"

Superman grabs Darkseid by the throat. Darkseid prod Superman to kill him, to kill a foe made of people. Supes recognizes his DNA in horror, and that of all the people he could of chosen like Batman, he chose Turpin. Darkseid says he would have resisted longer than he wanted. Darkseid orders the humans he controls to kill Superman who swarm him. Darkseid says that if Supes kills him, he kills everything.

Darkseid grabs the soul killing gun and says it is over. And if he is ready to join Batman. If he can outrace the Omega Sanction. Supes, being the eternal hero says that maybe he won't have to, he didn't get all of them "It's not over yet".

Then The humans look back and the Flashes comes out of nowhere, running as fast as they can, Black Racer on their tail.

Darkseid is aiming to kill. But the Flashes are racing towards him, for some reason Omega Beams chasing them(I don't remember this). The Flashes go into superluminal velocity. The bullet fires past Superman(not made clear, is behind him but he's alive rest of issue), Supes sees Barry. Darkseid sees the Black Racer in shock "no. not you." The flashes race through Darkseid, the Omega Beams hitting Darkseid. The Black Racer saying in cool large Black speech balloons "I come to all! Even You!"

Next Panel, Aquaman fighting the deep six. One third of the page sized panel. Apparently he was prophesied to return in his people's greatest need. That's it. No explanation. Just a small dodgy panel of him and the deep six, which you could not even tell since only two of them are shown. HAHAHA. All those people looking forward to it. Sorry.

The people Darkseid controlled are knocked out. Darkseid is on his knees vomiting blood. For some reason Lois narrates "This is the story of the last superheroes." "And the machine they made to save the world.

Next panel is Superman and Supergirl designing something in the watchtower. People talk and say it's an omni computer. Something that can calculate the life equation. A sort of cell phone to the gods. I think this scene jumps straight into a future time, and the rest of the final crisis is seen as a flashback.

Wonder Girl says that Superman found a way to think and bottle the whole universe for protection. A bunch of people work on this 'weapon' including Luthor and Sivanna who speculate it can rewrite the laws of physics.

Next page, Checkmate unleash the omacs who fight the Justifiers. Most likely flashback and the rest too.

Both Atoms are in the bleed(I think) Ryan says that the beacons in place but the tunnel between universes can't take these stresses.

The Black Gambit is failing as Lord Eye starts shutting down, Justifers are in Checkmate killing everyone.

In the JLA watchtower above space(now not broken? space is normal around them, or is a different watchtower) A barely conscious Black Canary floating, tells Ollie she thinks they did it. That Ray made it. As from the Watchtower she sees the circuit of Metron on the planet.(this was badly drawn, i didn't see it till now).

At checkmate the japanese heroes hold back the Justifiers next to a stargate(into the next universe). Someone screams the tunnel's collapsing and everybody out. Though it isn't made clear that they are going into it, or need to go out of it.

The JLA Watchtower starts falling to earth? I think.

Then cuts to a panel that is in the future of Supergirl telling Children a story of two whole universes shearing apart, But for some reason part of her gold lines are red so I thought it was that Nazi supergirl. It's just a mistake but it had me confused.

The Japanese heroes try and say their feeling as Lord Eye breaks down and reality shatters(in a really shitty style, just looks like the room is catching on fire). Hawkman says people will die if he doesn't stop Brother Eye. Everything is confusing. Then BOOM.

Next page. What still seems like a flashback is Renee Montoya saying that when Earth zero(formerly New Earth) fell into the abyss, mister miracles motherboxx secured a boom tube for everyone to escape to another universe. Panel below it, Kamandi standing in ruins of New York, people in front of him. For some reason there are solo bubbles(not connecting to anything) in this panel that says "looks like you missed a hell of a party sonny sumo" I don't know who is saying that, if the japanese heroes are in this Kamandi earth now? confusing.

Next panel has the Superman in the vessel talking with Renee, specifically Overman - all who are going back to Earth Zero. Next panel has Overman holding his cousin's body in a ruined earth(flashback? or a future scene?)

Next page, back to Darkseid and Supes. Superman tells Darkseid that john Stewart found the bullet he fired and Batman used it, so it was suicide. The furies come out the side, ready to attack Superman. Behind Superman, the armies of Libra comes out. Headed by Luthor and Sivanna. Superman is surrounded. Luthor says that the odds are against him and he's in charge of an army of mind controlled supervillains(captain cold, human flame are there). This is the last Panel of Darkseid in a body,he's just in front of Superman. That's it. He doesn't even wear the Omega suit! He's still in jeans! Seriously, how hard do you think Marvel will be laughing? "Their biggest villain, shows up, controls everyone, loses control of everyone, and disappears wearing jeans".

next panel, cut to Supergirl and Wonder Woman continuing the 'story' of what Superman did. Wonder Woman tells of how she was first introduced to Frankenstein.

Next panel. a flashback i guess. Frankenstein and his big dog grab wonder woman and he chops off a hunger dog's head. Supergirl knocks down giganta. Lois explains that moticoccus, the god bacterium was designed to strip earth's heroes of their powers(thank you countdown for fucking this up harder) but it had no effect on a living dead man and the villains had been innoculated. The villains take on the furies(very small panel) Then luthor tells Supes that this is the first historic team up of the forces of "good" and the forces of "bad" and he'll take credit for the win. Superman says "whatever you say Lex".

Next panel flashforward - is Superman, Wonder Woman and Supergirl in some room using a machine that is shooting a beam to a sort of container with people. Supergirl says it all feels so long ago and asks what happened to Luthor. Wonder Woman says that what used to be time is slowing to a stop. So I assume they're trying to do something before the end. Basically saying Luthor isn't important. Then next panel is Wonder Woman looking over small trays and says "the last survivors preserved on trays in a freezer". Supergirl says that everything feels broken and there has to be a way to fix it and the first thing she's going to do is find the guys who went to defend the east wall.

Cut to a panel of Frankenstein, Liberty belle, Supergirl, that spanish dude in a mech suit, powergirl and someone i don't recognize charging at Justifiers.

Next panel - flashforward(yes, it's fucking confusing until i got it's told as a story but that only happened somewhat into the comic). Superman holds Lois telling her that he'll restore her when it's all over. brainiac 5 allowed him to look at the miracle machine for a few seconds and he tried to memorize every nut, bolt and circuit.

Then the next panel is fuzzed as if a TV connection was cut, Lois says he'll get a big kiss when she's back from the fridge. There is no explanation of the shrinking miracle machine shit. It's just told to you that they do it, but never explain it, never show what they end up doing with the shrinking. Just show the aftermath and accept it. Fuck.

Next page, flashback, I think but this is the most confusing part. It has Wonder woman looking at her Fury(is that the singular term?) mask like in the previous issue where some people debated whether she was questioning what she was doing. Well same thing again but without explanation, she's normal, looking at the mask, no crazy eyes or wrinkles. She crushes it. Then next Panel she's just above the infected humans unleashing her lassoo, with red lightning around. Lois says It was Wonder Woman who bound Darkseid's body. With her lasso of truth, she chained the god of evil. And no one was Hurt. In the panel the infected people look as if they're choking, obviously waking up from the anti life. But this is one fucking panel. Terrible. really fucking confusing.

Next, flash forward - Superman uses heat vision to complete the miracle machine. One Chance, one wish. Next page. That crazy colors around Darkseid and from Seven Soldiers, happens to be Gods. In this case it's Darkseid who is like a corporeal being with a face. Darkseid says the walls are coming down around him, it's over. Superman says he's right and he's in the final stages of Radion poisoning. His composite body unable to move let alone act. There is no body here, just those colours with a face, kind of Darth Vaderish on Acid.

Next Panel Darkseid's corporeal form eyes, hover in front of Superman and the miracle machine, there's sort of spotty black blood around the eyes, from the top of the panel to the bottom. Darkseid says that he's "constructed a cargo cult motherbox capable of a single operation. How could he ask for a better gift to destroy you with?" Superman says that the multiverse vibrates together. And it makes a sound like an orchestra. Everything's vibrations. And Counter vibrations cancel them out. Next panel Superman screams or sings music. The Corporal Darkseid break in front of him like glass.

Next panel, the Watchtower exploding. Superman says Darkseid always hated music.

Next page. Superman is in cave like dark place as if hundreds of miles below the earth. He seems to be the only one in the multiverse. He walks towards Metron's chair. He is losing his voice. He sense a heartbeat coming from Metron's chair. He pulls it out from the symbol on his chair and it's Element X. "Fire of the gods. it can take any shape and become the last part of the jigsaw". Superman tells himself he needs to let his vocal cords heal to prepare for cosmic midnight. HE looks as if he's putting the element X into a torch. Then next panel things seem to be breaking above him. I can't tell, either it's the design of the cave, rocks are falling or spirits are forming.(yeah confusing)

Next panel Supes look to the side to hear Mandrakk. Mandrakk says his father failed to save his world and now it's his turn. Mandrakk appears before Supes with Ultraman carrying Supergirl(where the fuck did this come from?). Mandrakk says that the dying god left the universe wounded, broken, defenseless and alone where Mandrakk dwells. At the end of all stories. Mandrakk tells supes to come closer, he wants to eat him raw. blood coming out of his mouth. Wow, I would love to know the thoughts of all those who didn't buy Superman Beyond and don't know who the fuck this Giger Monitor is that comes out of nowhere, hahaha. Grant Morrions saying this is a story for everyone hahaha.

Next panel. Mandrakk drops the spectre and some chick in robes saying he fed on these servants of god, defenders of the universe.

Superman stands indifferent as Mandrakk stands behind him(shows what a heroic badass Supes is, not afraid of anything if he has to do something to save people). Mandrakk says that there is no light, no way to spark his weapon. And that he should die screaming in the arms of his master. Supes says he's had better offers and that he's a solar battery. He'll use it all if he has to, to activate the miracle machine. It powers up.

Next panel. The Green Lanterns see these giant bug like things. Their rings exhausted. Hal says that whatever they are, they are the way in and starts reciting the Oath "In brightest Day" etc.

next panel, the miracle machine is activated. Mandrakk asks what has he done. Supes says he relied on Captain Marvel of Earth 5 to come through. "Look up in the sky".

Next - double page splash of a whole lot of Supermen from the multiverse. Ultraman wants at them, but they all use heat vision on him. Same panel Nix Uotan says that thanks to Metron's intervention, he was free to act as a multiversal monitor.

Next panel. Nix Uotan says he arrived just in time for the last stand of these incredible creatures(superheroes). Nix says that his signal has been received and understood. and that it is between monitors now. The miracle machine was used as a communications device, I assume to call out for help of some kind.

Nix says that Superman stands at his right side and some exiled earth 35 animals he overlooked. A pig, a rabbit and a poodle which he seems to be transforming. Why this is here, I have no fucking idea.

Next panel, Nix Stands in front of Mandrakk with the Superman, the animals, one of which is captain carrot and two other characters I don't know. and "the vengeful angels of the pax dei descend, the army of god!" who the fuck are these cunts? just random characters show up without explanation. Apparently the assemebled Supermen team is so incredible it can only be assembled once against the ultimate enemy. Then he says "Do you hear me? "Let all who worship evil's might..."

then next panel "BEWARE MY POWER! GREEN LANTERNS; LIGHT!" The Green Lanterns arrive. Mandrakk says "Nix...Uotan? son?"

So this big assembled group of heroes stand before Mandrakk in about 4 panels...

Mandrakk says how could he be anything else and that with the word Taaru he summons the forever people of the 5th world. The Japanese heroes. But there is no summoning, they are already in this panel. Fuck. Also in this same panel the Supermen are already shooting Mandrakk with Heat vision.

Next panel Ultraman just burns for some reason. andrakk says he saw the book of Limbo and the end was all flames and shadows.

Next Panel Kyle says the rings can't handle it. Guy says they're outta juice. Soranik says they're 24 hours is up. Hal says then that together to give him one last effort. And to Spike this Vampire. Next Panel is a massive Nail/stake going through Mandrakk who is on flames.

Next panel is Nix holding Ultraman's burnt corpse saying the Multiverse has natural defenses none of them could imagine. "no one fucks with the judge of all evil".

next page is Lois narrating again, a Panel shows people helping rebuild, by taking down a Statue of Darkseid and throwing out Justifier helmets. But I don't get this since it doesn't match the Kamandi panel. Lois says that they lived through Ragnarok and fought a God. Survived the bite of a cosmic Parasite. And lost good friends.

Next panel is the Daily Planet staff in Perry's office, Perry reading something. Lois says that the world faces alien invasions, natural disasters in time. And they always recover. Earth always endures. Three small panels. Batman's Mask. A pyramid in Egypt. and Feathers.

Next panel the Watchtower above Earth. Then it pulls back to another panel and it's Earth zero in the Orrery with the Metron circuit over North America. A Monitor says the damage caused to the Orrery by Darkseid's fall is Under repair.

Next page. Nix stands before the Monitors. Nix says that the Germ creatures reestablished the symmetry of the Orrery.

Next panel has a real dodgy Infinite Crisis 7 style panel of The Green Lanterns and the Supermen of the Multiverse carrying an Earth somewhere. The Superman hold Green Lantern chains attached to their backs like a backpack. Nix says he's never witnessed such industry, such intelligence and such passion that drives them.

Next Panel are the flashes in the ruined city holding their loved ones. Nix says passions powerful enough to trigger changes in people like them.

Next panel, Nix advises immediate withdrawel of contact wiht the germ worlds and no further exploitation. A monitor says his concerns are noted and to continue.

Now this is where people are gonna be fucking pissed.

Next Panel has a ruined earth, not sure if it's the survived earth zero that shows people rebuilding or the ruined Kamandi earth. Anyway the ruined city is in the background and Metron floats in fron of a boulder draped with Orion's Astro Harness, beside the boulder a flower sprouting. Nix says that he "now knows why there is a black hole at the base of creation. It's where Darkseid fell through existence to his doom. Leaving Hell Deserted."

Next Panel. The New Gods. Mister Miracle, Highfather, Lightray and Big Barda with their backs towards us in some empty space with the Earth in front of them. The Forever people we saw in the sketchbook uncoloured and really small in front of the New Gods. This same panel has that spotty black blood on it. It has to mean something, I don't know what. That's it for the New Gods.

Next panel. Nix holds a map and says to the Monitors that The New Gods returned to guide the destiny of a New World. And the map he holds he used to reconstruct Earth 51.

Next Panel Kamandi holds Superman's cape, Kalibak's tigers in front of him. Kamandi says he saw the world remade with his own eyes. With pieces of other times, other places. All in a vision he saw in Command-D.

Next panel Nix says Earth 51 lives anew. Repairs were accomplished, time anomalies corrected, coherence and harmony restored(irony ha).

Next page a Monitor says Nix's exile is over and he is invited to rejoin with full honors.

Nix says he will decline such honors as meaningless and there are more important things to attend to.

Nix then walks away(I think) or he's standing with his back towards them. Saying that they almost destroyed the multiverse and it deserves its freedom from their interference. "Make your peace".

Next panel, Weeja Dell stands on a balcony. She says that overvoid draws closer, the hour grows late. Nix says they coudln't make him forget her, she brought him back. She says he sounds different.

Next panel - The panel itself looks as iff something is eating at it, with white behind the panel.Nix says he lived among them and he saw the damage they(monitors) were doing to them and what they'ed have to sacrifice to save them. And he won't forget her. She says "then this really is the last day."

Next panel below it, even smaller, eating away. Nix, holding Weeja Dell says he thinks it is. "The final crisis is ours". She says it was good to have a face and to love and be loved. She asks one last thing, what was superman's wish on the miracle machine.

Next panel even smaller, Nix kisses Weeja on the head and says "He's Superman. He wished only the best for all of us. Close your eyes"

Next panel which is very small, with the page behind white show Nix closing Weeja's eyes and saying "He wished for a happy ending". So what I assume is that Superman's wish for a happy ending, meant there can't be any Monitors.

Page Over, The first panel is Nix with his eyes closed, the Panel larger as if it's reforming.

Panel below it Nix wakes up in shock. The WGBS Radio is on. Saying "with more on those newly discovered parallel worlds and how they could change our lives forveer!"

Panel below it Has Nix woken up in a bed, just like in Final Crisis 1, as if it was all a dream. The radio says "This is one story that's only just the beginning".


BEWARE --- BIG MEGA SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Second last page.

Anthro as an old man, sits in the night in front of a fire. In front of him in the near distance, the rocket that was shot out from the Watchtower. The captions say that Old Man has finished refreshing the stories one final time at the holy ground(where Metron first appeared I assume).

The Caption says he thinks of Metron long ago. Holding a stick of fire.

Anthro paints the Metron synbol on a cave wall. The caption says he has made things with his hands that he first glimsped in his heart(either weapons he saw via the future vision?). The caption says he is filled one last time with a brilliant flame and Anthro smiles at something. Next Panel Anthro passes away on a rock.

Next Panel. Hands drop Batman's Utility belt on top of Anthro.

Next Page. BATMAN IS ALIVE. Bruce Wayne is crouching in front of the fire in shadow topless, with the bottom half of his uniform still on. Drawing the Bat Symbol on the cave wall. The Shadow above him forming the Bat costume shape - the cowl.


No Kamandi on last panel. Or Anthro is Kamandi?

No wonder, Didio said he didn't want to call the presses for Batman's fate. He's alive. So I guess his death was just to bring about Battle for the Cowl.

Hmmm. Where's Monarch?

*(For hellblazerraiser - After you finish waxing your vagina. I suggest you inject yourself with aids you fuckspoon cunt. Tell your mother she shouldn't have raised you like such a pussy. Or she should have swallowed you. Fuckwit)

Like smoke.

But the fire burns forever.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Green Lantern #37 - Review

The best comic you will find.

*Do not scroll down if you do not wish to see.