Wednesday, January 28, 2009


Written by Grant Morrison
Art by Doug Mahnke
DCU Rape by Dan Didio

Boy, are you fucks going to be pissed.

Superficially - no answers, more questions, more confusion.

First off so people read this. It's important.
Didio. It's called THE BLACKEST NIGHT, not BLACKEST NIGHT. Sounds more epic that way. People have been calling it The Blackest Night for months now, it's in the last fucking page of Sinestro Corps War, it's been called The Blackest Night on message boards everywhere, on wikipedia, stop being a fuck - call it 'The Blackest Night'. And it's a Green Lantern story, why do I want to see stories from non Green Lantern heroes in the main series. Fuck you are such a corporate cunt. You figure that you fucked up with Amazons Attack and that Sinestro Corps War was successful that you want to ride off the hype from it by milking it and changing it. Sinestro Corps War was successful and the hype for THE BLACKEST NIGHT is huge, so why not just do the same thing and let it be? Don't you realize that story is the reason it was successful? Why not let Geoff Johns do his thing, write a good story and even if you market it as a DC event, just let him do his thing. Because like a corporate cunt you want to milk it in the biggest possible way. This is why Marvel always beats you in everything. Fuck you.

Anyway, to Final Crisis # 7. What the fuck? You know, I didn't hate it. However I am completely confused and I wasn't one of those "I don't know what the fucks going on" dudes, but now I am. This issue isn't a mindfuck where you had to think like Superman Beyond was, this is more like "what the fuck?". There is no explanation on anything.

Seriously this is going to piss alot of people off, a few will drop DC Comics because of this issue and again many will call for Didio's head. But it will all be for the superficial things. Like the fact Darkseid ended up doing just about nothing in this series, that he really was not shown as the big ultra evil we were expecting, some people would say "but he controlled everybody and broke reality" but the scope wasn't there. He came and he went.

That sketchbook we all bought is fucking useless because just about none of the shit in there shows up. So all that lead time JG spent that some some apologists are using for the fact he was a slow penciller - is stupid because it was a waste of time.

And the multiverse itself is not really resolved, the future isn't set for the DCU or DCM.

This issue screams editorial incompetence. It should never have been called Crisis to begin with. This should of been something that Grant Morrison could do over time with a single artist. Maybe a graphic novel? Maybe DC didn't like his original plan and made him rewrite it.

The fucking epic "Heroes Die. Legends Live Forever" tagline makes absolutely no sense. Unless it means that Heroes always win, but either way, it's a letdown. I expected something that would set my balls on fire it would be that awesome. I really, really wish that original theory that the DCU was going to die and the main heroes were going to die and become New Gods from Earth 1 and the sidekicks would ascend to main hero status, whilst these New God heroes would live out of continuity. Nothing like that.

Final Crisis is just an exercise in Masturbation, Masturbating ideas, any ideas. That will have no effect on the DCU line, will be swept under the rug as if it never happened. It's not even going to be like people say, that Geoff Johns will have to come in and clean the mess. He doesn't have to. There are no changes, it won't make a difference. Everyone at DC and everyone who reads it will just forget about it, as if nothing happened and move on. Now I'm starting to think I just really didn't like this series, that it was a waste of money. All this talk of setting up the DC Universe for the next few years? Bullshit. No fucking difference.

Fucking hell, I was so excited for this, I imagined one of the most epic things ever. It's not as disappointing as Episode 1, but still disappointing. The fact that it won't make any difference within the DCU should of been enough to let DC do what Grant Morrison originally intended and just call it an Elseworlds book or something. They would of been better off releasing something good which means nothing than something shit that doesn't make any difference. Thinking like this is what makes Marvel take 50% of the retail market. Yes, they're smarter than you DC.

The art itself is mediocre. How? You say. If you remember my Superman Beyond #2 review, you'd note that I said Doug Mahnke is going to be a superstar, and I still believe that. His art in that issue was incredible. But here, rush job. Not his fault. But fuck you can see the difference, you can see he was put under pressure because the heads at DC don't know what the fuck is up, or that rumor about Didio fucking everything up cos of pussy is true. Whatever, it isn't the prettiest art. The detail isn't there. Some panels are pretty good, some are pretty bad, not Infinite Crisis #7 bad, but somewhere in that ballpark. And jamming so much into one comic, not allowing the story to flow. Stupid fucking idea. I guess I was right a year ago. Seven issues is too short. So to all those who said it will be enough, fuck you. You were wrong.

Ohh and the storytelling after reading it again - either I just don't get it, or it's bad storytelling. I think it's the latter. Sorry Mahnke.

Honestly, thank God it's over. Or thank Darkseid it's over.

Now here's a semi detailed Recap of the Issue - Plus a final page which will make you go...what?



Look at the previews on Newsamara for the first pages.

A black Superman who is president, obviously an allusion to Barack Obama meets Wonder Woman who has a Wonder Horn to be used at the end of everything. The horn opens up a hole which has The Question, Captain Marvel and Supermen of the multiverse in it, they're here to pick up the Superman of this Earth.

On the Watchtower (which reading again now seems to be fused with the Fortess of Solitude), someone narrates and talks about the crumbling world and how the Metal Men of Earth 44 went berzerk in their magnetic field, causing them to commit technocide. And that they wrecked the trophy room and mementoes were lost forever. The person narrating is Lois Lane and she says that they what remained into a rocket. Including the last edition of the Daily Planet with the story of Supoerheroes, the story of the people they loved. The story of the death of Batman and how a man had fatally wounded the God of Evil. And that someone, somewhere will read the story of the Final Crisis.

Some heroes on the watchtower fight the Metal Men of Earth 44. Until Luthor and Sivanna arrive with a weapon and disable them. The rocket is sent out of the watchtower with mementoes like the bat signal and Superman's cape.

Next page, Superman - holding Batman's body. "Darkseid." Darkseid says that Supes turned his back and he wrecked his world. That all his friends, enemies and lovers are him. One life that is Darkseid. In a freaky close up of Darkseid, he sayd "will you be the enemy of all existence then? What Irony that will be, son of Krypton. HAHAHAHAHA!"

Superman grabs Darkseid by the throat. Darkseid prod Superman to kill him, to kill a foe made of people. Supes recognizes his DNA in horror, and that of all the people he could of chosen like Batman, he chose Turpin. Darkseid says he would have resisted longer than he wanted. Darkseid orders the humans he controls to kill Superman who swarm him. Darkseid says that if Supes kills him, he kills everything.

Darkseid grabs the soul killing gun and says it is over. And if he is ready to join Batman. If he can outrace the Omega Sanction. Supes, being the eternal hero says that maybe he won't have to, he didn't get all of them "It's not over yet".

Then The humans look back and the Flashes comes out of nowhere, running as fast as they can, Black Racer on their tail.

Darkseid is aiming to kill. But the Flashes are racing towards him, for some reason Omega Beams chasing them(I don't remember this). The Flashes go into superluminal velocity. The bullet fires past Superman(not made clear, is behind him but he's alive rest of issue), Supes sees Barry. Darkseid sees the Black Racer in shock "no. not you." The flashes race through Darkseid, the Omega Beams hitting Darkseid. The Black Racer saying in cool large Black speech balloons "I come to all! Even You!"

Next Panel, Aquaman fighting the deep six. One third of the page sized panel. Apparently he was prophesied to return in his people's greatest need. That's it. No explanation. Just a small dodgy panel of him and the deep six, which you could not even tell since only two of them are shown. HAHAHA. All those people looking forward to it. Sorry.

The people Darkseid controlled are knocked out. Darkseid is on his knees vomiting blood. For some reason Lois narrates "This is the story of the last superheroes." "And the machine they made to save the world.

Next panel is Superman and Supergirl designing something in the watchtower. People talk and say it's an omni computer. Something that can calculate the life equation. A sort of cell phone to the gods. I think this scene jumps straight into a future time, and the rest of the final crisis is seen as a flashback.

Wonder Girl says that Superman found a way to think and bottle the whole universe for protection. A bunch of people work on this 'weapon' including Luthor and Sivanna who speculate it can rewrite the laws of physics.

Next page, Checkmate unleash the omacs who fight the Justifiers. Most likely flashback and the rest too.

Both Atoms are in the bleed(I think) Ryan says that the beacons in place but the tunnel between universes can't take these stresses.

The Black Gambit is failing as Lord Eye starts shutting down, Justifers are in Checkmate killing everyone.

In the JLA watchtower above space(now not broken? space is normal around them, or is a different watchtower) A barely conscious Black Canary floating, tells Ollie she thinks they did it. That Ray made it. As from the Watchtower she sees the circuit of Metron on the planet.(this was badly drawn, i didn't see it till now).

At checkmate the japanese heroes hold back the Justifiers next to a stargate(into the next universe). Someone screams the tunnel's collapsing and everybody out. Though it isn't made clear that they are going into it, or need to go out of it.

The JLA Watchtower starts falling to earth? I think.

Then cuts to a panel that is in the future of Supergirl telling Children a story of two whole universes shearing apart, But for some reason part of her gold lines are red so I thought it was that Nazi supergirl. It's just a mistake but it had me confused.

The Japanese heroes try and say their feeling as Lord Eye breaks down and reality shatters(in a really shitty style, just looks like the room is catching on fire). Hawkman says people will die if he doesn't stop Brother Eye. Everything is confusing. Then BOOM.

Next page. What still seems like a flashback is Renee Montoya saying that when Earth zero(formerly New Earth) fell into the abyss, mister miracles motherboxx secured a boom tube for everyone to escape to another universe. Panel below it, Kamandi standing in ruins of New York, people in front of him. For some reason there are solo bubbles(not connecting to anything) in this panel that says "looks like you missed a hell of a party sonny sumo" I don't know who is saying that, if the japanese heroes are in this Kamandi earth now? confusing.

Next panel has the Superman in the vessel talking with Renee, specifically Overman - all who are going back to Earth Zero. Next panel has Overman holding his cousin's body in a ruined earth(flashback? or a future scene?)

Next page, back to Darkseid and Supes. Superman tells Darkseid that john Stewart found the bullet he fired and Batman used it, so it was suicide. The furies come out the side, ready to attack Superman. Behind Superman, the armies of Libra comes out. Headed by Luthor and Sivanna. Superman is surrounded. Luthor says that the odds are against him and he's in charge of an army of mind controlled supervillains(captain cold, human flame are there). This is the last Panel of Darkseid in a body,he's just in front of Superman. That's it. He doesn't even wear the Omega suit! He's still in jeans! Seriously, how hard do you think Marvel will be laughing? "Their biggest villain, shows up, controls everyone, loses control of everyone, and disappears wearing jeans".

next panel, cut to Supergirl and Wonder Woman continuing the 'story' of what Superman did. Wonder Woman tells of how she was first introduced to Frankenstein.

Next panel. a flashback i guess. Frankenstein and his big dog grab wonder woman and he chops off a hunger dog's head. Supergirl knocks down giganta. Lois explains that moticoccus, the god bacterium was designed to strip earth's heroes of their powers(thank you countdown for fucking this up harder) but it had no effect on a living dead man and the villains had been innoculated. The villains take on the furies(very small panel) Then luthor tells Supes that this is the first historic team up of the forces of "good" and the forces of "bad" and he'll take credit for the win. Superman says "whatever you say Lex".

Next panel flashforward - is Superman, Wonder Woman and Supergirl in some room using a machine that is shooting a beam to a sort of container with people. Supergirl says it all feels so long ago and asks what happened to Luthor. Wonder Woman says that what used to be time is slowing to a stop. So I assume they're trying to do something before the end. Basically saying Luthor isn't important. Then next panel is Wonder Woman looking over small trays and says "the last survivors preserved on trays in a freezer". Supergirl says that everything feels broken and there has to be a way to fix it and the first thing she's going to do is find the guys who went to defend the east wall.

Cut to a panel of Frankenstein, Liberty belle, Supergirl, that spanish dude in a mech suit, powergirl and someone i don't recognize charging at Justifiers.

Next panel - flashforward(yes, it's fucking confusing until i got it's told as a story but that only happened somewhat into the comic). Superman holds Lois telling her that he'll restore her when it's all over. brainiac 5 allowed him to look at the miracle machine for a few seconds and he tried to memorize every nut, bolt and circuit.

Then the next panel is fuzzed as if a TV connection was cut, Lois says he'll get a big kiss when she's back from the fridge. There is no explanation of the shrinking miracle machine shit. It's just told to you that they do it, but never explain it, never show what they end up doing with the shrinking. Just show the aftermath and accept it. Fuck.

Next page, flashback, I think but this is the most confusing part. It has Wonder woman looking at her Fury(is that the singular term?) mask like in the previous issue where some people debated whether she was questioning what she was doing. Well same thing again but without explanation, she's normal, looking at the mask, no crazy eyes or wrinkles. She crushes it. Then next Panel she's just above the infected humans unleashing her lassoo, with red lightning around. Lois says It was Wonder Woman who bound Darkseid's body. With her lasso of truth, she chained the god of evil. And no one was Hurt. In the panel the infected people look as if they're choking, obviously waking up from the anti life. But this is one fucking panel. Terrible. really fucking confusing.

Next, flash forward - Superman uses heat vision to complete the miracle machine. One Chance, one wish. Next page. That crazy colors around Darkseid and from Seven Soldiers, happens to be Gods. In this case it's Darkseid who is like a corporeal being with a face. Darkseid says the walls are coming down around him, it's over. Superman says he's right and he's in the final stages of Radion poisoning. His composite body unable to move let alone act. There is no body here, just those colours with a face, kind of Darth Vaderish on Acid.

Next Panel Darkseid's corporeal form eyes, hover in front of Superman and the miracle machine, there's sort of spotty black blood around the eyes, from the top of the panel to the bottom. Darkseid says that he's "constructed a cargo cult motherbox capable of a single operation. How could he ask for a better gift to destroy you with?" Superman says that the multiverse vibrates together. And it makes a sound like an orchestra. Everything's vibrations. And Counter vibrations cancel them out. Next panel Superman screams or sings music. The Corporal Darkseid break in front of him like glass.

Next panel, the Watchtower exploding. Superman says Darkseid always hated music.

Next page. Superman is in cave like dark place as if hundreds of miles below the earth. He seems to be the only one in the multiverse. He walks towards Metron's chair. He is losing his voice. He sense a heartbeat coming from Metron's chair. He pulls it out from the symbol on his chair and it's Element X. "Fire of the gods. it can take any shape and become the last part of the jigsaw". Superman tells himself he needs to let his vocal cords heal to prepare for cosmic midnight. HE looks as if he's putting the element X into a torch. Then next panel things seem to be breaking above him. I can't tell, either it's the design of the cave, rocks are falling or spirits are forming.(yeah confusing)

Next panel Supes look to the side to hear Mandrakk. Mandrakk says his father failed to save his world and now it's his turn. Mandrakk appears before Supes with Ultraman carrying Supergirl(where the fuck did this come from?). Mandrakk says that the dying god left the universe wounded, broken, defenseless and alone where Mandrakk dwells. At the end of all stories. Mandrakk tells supes to come closer, he wants to eat him raw. blood coming out of his mouth. Wow, I would love to know the thoughts of all those who didn't buy Superman Beyond and don't know who the fuck this Giger Monitor is that comes out of nowhere, hahaha. Grant Morrions saying this is a story for everyone hahaha.

Next panel. Mandrakk drops the spectre and some chick in robes saying he fed on these servants of god, defenders of the universe.

Superman stands indifferent as Mandrakk stands behind him(shows what a heroic badass Supes is, not afraid of anything if he has to do something to save people). Mandrakk says that there is no light, no way to spark his weapon. And that he should die screaming in the arms of his master. Supes says he's had better offers and that he's a solar battery. He'll use it all if he has to, to activate the miracle machine. It powers up.

Next panel. The Green Lanterns see these giant bug like things. Their rings exhausted. Hal says that whatever they are, they are the way in and starts reciting the Oath "In brightest Day" etc.

next panel, the miracle machine is activated. Mandrakk asks what has he done. Supes says he relied on Captain Marvel of Earth 5 to come through. "Look up in the sky".

Next - double page splash of a whole lot of Supermen from the multiverse. Ultraman wants at them, but they all use heat vision on him. Same panel Nix Uotan says that thanks to Metron's intervention, he was free to act as a multiversal monitor.

Next panel. Nix Uotan says he arrived just in time for the last stand of these incredible creatures(superheroes). Nix says that his signal has been received and understood. and that it is between monitors now. The miracle machine was used as a communications device, I assume to call out for help of some kind.

Nix says that Superman stands at his right side and some exiled earth 35 animals he overlooked. A pig, a rabbit and a poodle which he seems to be transforming. Why this is here, I have no fucking idea.

Next panel, Nix Stands in front of Mandrakk with the Superman, the animals, one of which is captain carrot and two other characters I don't know. and "the vengeful angels of the pax dei descend, the army of god!" who the fuck are these cunts? just random characters show up without explanation. Apparently the assemebled Supermen team is so incredible it can only be assembled once against the ultimate enemy. Then he says "Do you hear me? "Let all who worship evil's might..."

then next panel "BEWARE MY POWER! GREEN LANTERNS; LIGHT!" The Green Lanterns arrive. Mandrakk says "Nix...Uotan? son?"

So this big assembled group of heroes stand before Mandrakk in about 4 panels...

Mandrakk says how could he be anything else and that with the word Taaru he summons the forever people of the 5th world. The Japanese heroes. But there is no summoning, they are already in this panel. Fuck. Also in this same panel the Supermen are already shooting Mandrakk with Heat vision.

Next panel Ultraman just burns for some reason. andrakk says he saw the book of Limbo and the end was all flames and shadows.

Next Panel Kyle says the rings can't handle it. Guy says they're outta juice. Soranik says they're 24 hours is up. Hal says then that together to give him one last effort. And to Spike this Vampire. Next Panel is a massive Nail/stake going through Mandrakk who is on flames.

Next panel is Nix holding Ultraman's burnt corpse saying the Multiverse has natural defenses none of them could imagine. "no one fucks with the judge of all evil".

next page is Lois narrating again, a Panel shows people helping rebuild, by taking down a Statue of Darkseid and throwing out Justifier helmets. But I don't get this since it doesn't match the Kamandi panel. Lois says that they lived through Ragnarok and fought a God. Survived the bite of a cosmic Parasite. And lost good friends.

Next panel is the Daily Planet staff in Perry's office, Perry reading something. Lois says that the world faces alien invasions, natural disasters in time. And they always recover. Earth always endures. Three small panels. Batman's Mask. A pyramid in Egypt. and Feathers.

Next panel the Watchtower above Earth. Then it pulls back to another panel and it's Earth zero in the Orrery with the Metron circuit over North America. A Monitor says the damage caused to the Orrery by Darkseid's fall is Under repair.

Next page. Nix stands before the Monitors. Nix says that the Germ creatures reestablished the symmetry of the Orrery.

Next panel has a real dodgy Infinite Crisis 7 style panel of The Green Lanterns and the Supermen of the Multiverse carrying an Earth somewhere. The Superman hold Green Lantern chains attached to their backs like a backpack. Nix says he's never witnessed such industry, such intelligence and such passion that drives them.

Next Panel are the flashes in the ruined city holding their loved ones. Nix says passions powerful enough to trigger changes in people like them.

Next panel, Nix advises immediate withdrawel of contact wiht the germ worlds and no further exploitation. A monitor says his concerns are noted and to continue.

Now this is where people are gonna be fucking pissed.

Next Panel has a ruined earth, not sure if it's the survived earth zero that shows people rebuilding or the ruined Kamandi earth. Anyway the ruined city is in the background and Metron floats in fron of a boulder draped with Orion's Astro Harness, beside the boulder a flower sprouting. Nix says that he "now knows why there is a black hole at the base of creation. It's where Darkseid fell through existence to his doom. Leaving Hell Deserted."

Next Panel. The New Gods. Mister Miracle, Highfather, Lightray and Big Barda with their backs towards us in some empty space with the Earth in front of them. The Forever people we saw in the sketchbook uncoloured and really small in front of the New Gods. This same panel has that spotty black blood on it. It has to mean something, I don't know what. That's it for the New Gods.

Next panel. Nix holds a map and says to the Monitors that The New Gods returned to guide the destiny of a New World. And the map he holds he used to reconstruct Earth 51.

Next Panel Kamandi holds Superman's cape, Kalibak's tigers in front of him. Kamandi says he saw the world remade with his own eyes. With pieces of other times, other places. All in a vision he saw in Command-D.

Next panel Nix says Earth 51 lives anew. Repairs were accomplished, time anomalies corrected, coherence and harmony restored(irony ha).

Next page a Monitor says Nix's exile is over and he is invited to rejoin with full honors.

Nix says he will decline such honors as meaningless and there are more important things to attend to.

Nix then walks away(I think) or he's standing with his back towards them. Saying that they almost destroyed the multiverse and it deserves its freedom from their interference. "Make your peace".

Next panel, Weeja Dell stands on a balcony. She says that overvoid draws closer, the hour grows late. Nix says they coudln't make him forget her, she brought him back. She says he sounds different.

Next panel - The panel itself looks as iff something is eating at it, with white behind the panel.Nix says he lived among them and he saw the damage they(monitors) were doing to them and what they'ed have to sacrifice to save them. And he won't forget her. She says "then this really is the last day."

Next panel below it, even smaller, eating away. Nix, holding Weeja Dell says he thinks it is. "The final crisis is ours". She says it was good to have a face and to love and be loved. She asks one last thing, what was superman's wish on the miracle machine.

Next panel even smaller, Nix kisses Weeja on the head and says "He's Superman. He wished only the best for all of us. Close your eyes"

Next panel which is very small, with the page behind white show Nix closing Weeja's eyes and saying "He wished for a happy ending". So what I assume is that Superman's wish for a happy ending, meant there can't be any Monitors.

Page Over, The first panel is Nix with his eyes closed, the Panel larger as if it's reforming.

Panel below it Nix wakes up in shock. The WGBS Radio is on. Saying "with more on those newly discovered parallel worlds and how they could change our lives forveer!"

Panel below it Has Nix woken up in a bed, just like in Final Crisis 1, as if it was all a dream. The radio says "This is one story that's only just the beginning".


BEWARE --- BIG MEGA SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Second last page.

Anthro as an old man, sits in the night in front of a fire. In front of him in the near distance, the rocket that was shot out from the Watchtower. The captions say that Old Man has finished refreshing the stories one final time at the holy ground(where Metron first appeared I assume).

The Caption says he thinks of Metron long ago. Holding a stick of fire.

Anthro paints the Metron synbol on a cave wall. The caption says he has made things with his hands that he first glimsped in his heart(either weapons he saw via the future vision?). The caption says he is filled one last time with a brilliant flame and Anthro smiles at something. Next Panel Anthro passes away on a rock.

Next Panel. Hands drop Batman's Utility belt on top of Anthro.

Next Page. BATMAN IS ALIVE. Bruce Wayne is crouching in front of the fire in shadow topless, with the bottom half of his uniform still on. Drawing the Bat Symbol on the cave wall. The Shadow above him forming the Bat costume shape - the cowl.


No Kamandi on last panel. Or Anthro is Kamandi?

No wonder, Didio said he didn't want to call the presses for Batman's fate. He's alive. So I guess his death was just to bring about Battle for the Cowl.

Hmmm. Where's Monarch?

*(For hellblazerraiser - After you finish waxing your vagina. I suggest you inject yourself with aids you fuckspoon cunt. Tell your mother she shouldn't have raised you like such a pussy. Or she should have swallowed you. Fuckwit)

Like smoke.

But the fire burns forever.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Green Lantern #37 - Review

The best comic you will find.

*Do not scroll down if you do not wish to see.


Superman Beyond #2 Recap/Review/Theories

* Prepare to be assaulted by epicness to your brain.
** Partial recap, also part review, opinions and theories, feel free to comment on your ideas.

Now this lives up to it's name and the hype. This is the real Final Crisis.

All that mindfuck ultra-epicness of ninja proportions unimaginable is in this book.

I don't get it(not the issue). Final Crisis is so small and rushed yet these two issues, especially this one is so fucking massive. I probably am completely wrong about what happened in this issue but what I get from it is that like Grant Morrison said, the DC Universe or DC Multiverse is alive and lives off the stories written by DC writers. It's very metatextual.

I believe what Morrison gets at is there is a universe where the multiverse exists and in that multiverse are further universes - 52 of them.

In this universe, or multiverse - where there is good, there is evil. And in this specific multiverse there is ultimate good - Superman and there is ultimate evil - Mandrakk. This idea that everything was born from Superman(metatextually the DCU, since Action #1 essentially created the DCU) is still in place. And even more I think(I may be wrong) but within the story Superman was 'created' for this very moment. To save the multiverse and reality. Either specifically this moment, or just be the ultimate hero.

The story itself begins in Limbo with Ultraman having the infinite book and discovering there is an ultimate evil threat. Mandrakk. Superman being the ultimate tough hero there is, sees it as a challenge. I think Mandrakk woke because Ultraman saw him, sort of wishing him into existence in this universe where the monitors live where anything is possible.

Zillo Valla the monitor has has grabbed this team of Superman from across the multiverse helps Billy Batson remember the word. In this scene Overman - the Nazi superman says she's a vampire and he doesn't want her to deceive them any further and she must be killed.

In Limbo a MASSIVE war is happening between the forgotten and the phantom armies who "are yet to be". Captain Atom starts discovering things such as the fact they are so small but they matter greatly. Superman doesn't care, he;ll do anything, he just wants to save Lois.

Ultraman wants to take the Monitor's ship "the Ultima Thule" and use it to let everyone else in the multiverse learn about it. Superman of course says he'll have to go through him first and if they touch, they annihilate each other.

Captain Marvel returns, the Fawcett Marvel. He mentions how the story they saw in the book showed that the monitors had a weapon against Mandrakk. Superman tries to get Captain Atom to help and he starts becoming 'self aware', enlightened to imagination and suddenly he can replicate himself infinitely. He starts to learn that the weapon is a thought robot that activates with massive energy caused by a collison of symmetries. Superman and Ultraman in this case.

All Superman needs is a single drop of refined bleed from the monitor world for Lois and he doesn't care what it takes.

Captain Marvel says how the book said "ultimate evil is ultimate good" "the most despised will save the most beloved" which leads to a cool moment of a giant Captain Atom saying "Hate crime, meet selfless act" and clashing both Ultraman and Superman together. Which leads to a massive unimaginbale big bang type explosion with energy that we couldn't comprehend with only Atom holding the power under control.

It's hard describing this story literally because it comes across as 'metaphysical science fiction poetry'. The weapon is unleashed and it's Superman with the Orrary armor. When Superman wakes, it's epic, it's almost spiritual. He's in another world. A place beyond, space, time, reality. it kind of looks like Gondor and Rivendell from The Lord of the Rings movies mixed together. With a light sand brown hue.

A monitor I believe being Zillo Valla explains that one of the monitors named Dax novu left a living weapon. A thought robot capable of adapting to any threat. A sentinel suit designed to fight the ultimate enemy.

Reading the next parts is fucking my brain. But it is awesome. Superman says he wakens in a body of pure thought. The way it's drawn, it's similar to when Neo becomes one with the Matrix at the end of the movie, like he's ascended to a higher plane. You can hear the electronic synth music as if it were a film. It looks amazing. He looks amazing. The rusty, mechanical almost steam punk look of Superman's sentinel suit. Epic, beautiful stuff. Mahnke is going to be a superstar.

Superman and Weeja Dell walk though a cemetary into a courtyard. This double splash page is a double splash page of awesomeness. Remember in The Two Towers when it shows the future scenes of Arwen mourning the loss of Aragorn. That architecture with the wind and leaves blowing. Similar to that. Fuck, I don't even know how to explain this. Superman talks about how he saw the monitors at the end of the book, the book which holds every book written. Basically this is the final chapter.

Superman says the Monitors were numberless and faceless until exposure to the struggles of human life changed their nature. Superman now massive says poetically about the Monitors "Until narratives formed around them, like crystals in solution. Incredible. I'm walking among primal forms in a fundamental world."

Fuck, this is epic. Everthing I used to imagination about Revelations and how it just wasn't big enough, this takes the cake, this is huge. It's also 'out there'.

The Monitors realize they fucked up, Weeja says how they exiled Nix unfairly. A monitor mentions "how can our judgment be wrong?" Basically nothing makes sense anymore. They realize somehing afoul is afoot. Superman sees bleed is being siphoned towards a monument. "I feel a chill as the story grows into place around me."

The doors open and Superman sees the Orrary of a shattered jar. Dying.

Shown on panel are what look like zombie Monitors. One of them mentions how they shunned 'him'. Because he showed their true faces.

It's there where Superman realizes that the entire multiverse is prey to celestial parasites. "Vampire Gods!". A panel shows a monitor with a vampire face upside down holding onto one of the planets in the orrary, they look the same as normal monitors, just with campire like fangs and faces that look like they're on crack. This upside down fuck mentions how they took Nix out of the picture who was the one who could stop them and now his brother(Mandrakk for the stupid) wakes.

The coloring here is beautiful, in fact the whole thing is beautiful but these pages where Superman wears the suit. Amazing.

Superman's dialogue in this is mythic. Lord of the Rings esque, fittingly if it's the Lord of the Rings of the DCU. "This is it. The first outcast rises from reeking shadows of neglect, self-loathing and rage, speaking my name as I speak his" "Mandrakk".

In a full splash page. Mandrakk. A mix between a Monitor, a Vampire and a Giger alien. About the same size as Superman. He is holding the elixir of bleed which superman wants to save Lois. But apparently only monitors can use it. He says all he has to do is take it from him. Of course Superman being the hero he is tells the monitors to get out of there and he'll deal with Mandrakk. It shows again why Superman is the ultimate mythic superhero, why he's beyond Hercules, Jesus or anyone in myth. Because he just doesn't give up and here he is taking on the end of everything, because his wife is in danger and people's lives are in danger. Even if he didn't have the suit, he'd still fight. He has no fear. The way it's drawn, written, I think this New Earth characterization of Superman that Morrison writes is even better than the All Star Superman he writes.

They fight. And I mean they really fight. But Grant Morrison style. In caption Superman yells how he's in a self-assembling hyper story. Yes, the Morrison elements are at their ultimate here. The fight itself is epic, amazingly drawn. Both fight with Energy powers, Supes with his heat vision, Mandrakk with lightning from his hands and white lightning from his eyes. I can't get over how it's drawn, the lightning around Mandrakk with Superman in front of him.

The fight continues with Superman falling to the ground but of course not giving up. It's here that Zillo Valla says that Mandrakk is using them to believe him into existence. But in one of the best most mythic things i've heard in comics, she says that deep within the germworlds(the multiverse worlds) she found a "better story; one created to be unstoppable, indestructible! The story of a child rocketed to Earth from a doomed planet..." Mandrakk destroys her when he starts to realize, that he killed Zillo Valla, his lover. So Zillo Valla was using the Superman to set free or create Mandrakk but then she pulls this idea of the eternal story of Superman. So I don't really get what was happening. But it does hit you how this is metatextual that within this Universe Superman cannot be beaten, his story is myth and unstoppable because that's how it is in our world.

Superman screams at Mandrakk and they fight, Mandrakk blaming Superman. In a panel we see white light(the fight between Superman) basically engulfing the monitor city. The Monitor world or universe is like a place of dreams, where everything from imagination; art, architecture are part of the city.

Supes and Mandrakk continue to fight, destroying everything around them. The stronger Mandrakk gets, the stronger Hulk gets...I mean Superman. Mandrakk tries to get past Superman to destroy the Orrarry but Supes doesn't let him pass. He is more determined about stopping him than anything he's ever done, as if he was meant for this.

Superman starts beating Mandrakk with heat vision when he says that he knows that he is "part of monitor(no grammar error) that felt contaminated by the multiverse". He is Dax Novu, the greatest of the monitors. Supes shoots him off a ledge into white nothingness. It suddenly starts to get into this idea that everything is Monitor, and with Mandrakk thrown off the ledge Monitor forgets Mandrakk.

With Superman victorious, he stands in front of his tombstone, a referential one that may be his one day. A dream of sorts. He incribes his epitah on it. A monitor tells him that the elixir cannot be taken out of their world but Supes says he'll find a way.

Superman seperates from Ultraman and they both fall through the multiverse back into the void where Mandrakk's Destroyer is. And Supes, Overman and Captain marvel set about destroying it's missiles. Sounds simple but I can't even explain how the dialogue works or how it's set. This is some of the most mindfuck shit i've read.

Ultraman plummets into a void with Mandrakk, who promptly corrupts him, turning him into a "Terror Knight" a "vampire superman".

Mandrakk in Gigerish form says the whole of existence is in a book and when he returns, Superman will be at his weakest, and when all hope is lost. He will come, with armies of millions. So what we can take from this is that everything is manipulated and not even Darkseid knows what's coming, at the end of things, mandrakk will show up to completely fuck everyone over.

Back in Metropolis, Superman reappears at the hospital and mentions how they said nothing can hold bleed, but they were wrong. Superman can. he kisses Lois and she's back to normal. She says she had a dream where she saw things, in a deep dark place and saw his tombstone. Where she read the inscription and knew everything was going to be alright. She asks for a pen and paper to write down the dream, Clark promptly goes and gets it, happy that everything's alright.

The final page. The tombstone with the inscription "TO BE CONTINUED".

I wish Grant Morrison wrote the bible, or retconned it. This is much more tighter in ideas and FAAARRR more Epic than that silly Christianity nonsense. A Christian tells you how this will happen in Revelations and that it will be things you can't imagine. Hand them both copies of Superman Beyond and tell them, this is far more epic than your bullshit.

It was fucking hard describing what happens because it will only make sense with the visuals though i'm pretty sure the majority of people will close the book and say "....what?" anyway. The Visuals itself remind me or arty music videos, videos of worlds and images that don't exist. Blown away.

The 3D adds to the scenes where Supes becomes a godlike being with the super suit. It's amazing. I don't understand why this wasn't part of Final Crisis or the story itself, this is even bigger than infinite crisis or COIE, remember that feeling where the scope up to issue 4 was so huge in Infinite Crisis. This is even bigger. In a world where the Ideas of the DCu become real, and rules like Superman being the most important hero of the DCU, the nexus, becomes reality. Amaizng stuff.

I don't know if this clarifies the stuff in Final Crisis, because this seems more 'Crisis' whereas the actual Final Crisis is more about the New Gods. This is the whole reality, multiverse smashing, existensialism we all thought we were going to get. Maybe this didn't have much editorial raping? Either way, this has ideas that seem like they were thought by Alan Moore on drugs that don't exist, whilst having sex with a space goddess in a dimension made of chocalate art.

Also there is no lead in to Legion of 3 worlds. So I assume once Lois is better which happens as Final Crisis is underway, he gets pulled into the 31st century. Poor guy, imagine how tired he is.

Read the whole issue with the glasses, even if only half of it is actual 3D, the colouring and inks jump at you.

I loved this issue. Fucking loved it. Everyone needs to buy it. I can't wait to hear theories, especially the metatextual ones. Doug Mahnke is the next big thing. You just watch.

Big Mandrakk the Dark Monitor.

I am Mandrakk. I am blurry. See me in 3 Dimensions.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I'll be back tomorrow.

I'll be back tomorrow with a recap/review of Superman Beyond #2 and a Green Lantern #37 review.

Also it's been hilarious reading responses to the Final Crisis #6 review and the issue in general, and people criticizing me(most turned out to be blind Final Crisis followers). To those enjoying my balls out approach, I will be back.

Here's my favorite quote I found today on the forum

"Final Crisis is awesome. Morrison has written a great story equal to Alan Moore and Jack Kirby." - t67443

No, it isn't sarcastic.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

FINAL CRISIS #6 - Review

The Batman is dead.

Read it again, The Batman is dead.

If you want to see it. Comment. (the Batman pics are at the bottom of the review)

I'm back. Notorious aintitcool talkback superstar messi(now known as messi part II) with the first Final Crisis reviews in the world.

Onto Final Exposition #6.

Final Crisis is a clusterfuck, a mediocre failure. I don't know what went wrong, Editorial mismanagement*(which still keeps going on), rewrites, bad decisions, someone sleeping with someone's wife. Whatever it is, this has pretty much been a lackluster event, even when things seemed to 'kick off' at Issue #4 it still didn't have the oomph that other events had. The whole fact that it was billed as the most epic thing ever since Ninjas were invented, yet turned out to be a rush job just adds another nail to the coffin that is being built for DC. The loud complaints regardless of the few apologists of this series (hello dotdotdot of comicbookresources you cock and the 4th pip you ass**, and hello to the softcocks who run those forums - "children read these forums", no they don't. grow some balls.) are very loud, the reaction is either "not bad" or "meh". Not the reaction you want to "The Lord of the Rings of the DCU".

I also want to say to some people, i'm just cutting the bullshit. I looked forward to this event like nothing before. It sounded so epic, it was talked about as so epic. I really though i'd get the first issue and I would ascend to the heavens. Instead I went "....what?". I really looked forward to it but if at Issue 6 of 7 you are looking for the best in it...well. Kind of says alot about the story.

What I can take that is great from this specific issue and the previous ones are the Ideas. They are Grand. Real mindfuck stuff. I still believe Grant Morrison should have written the bible, or should retcon the current one. Crisis on Infinite Religions. I will get to some of the grand moments such as Metron's appearance but to the issue at hand.

As you will know, reality is breaking, and everything is becoming Darkseid. So essentially he is controlling everything, or everything is dying or becoming deleted or something. Darkseid's whole thing is that he wants power so when he has it all, what does he live for? Half of humanity is subjugated, becoming the voice of Darkseid, he controls them. The other half are desperate to survive.

Thanks to the delays we find out here that this takes place after Superman Beyond and after Legion of 3 Worlds which finishes in a few months (hahaha ohh DC). Brainiac 5 introduces Superman to the God Weapon, the Miracle Machine. A machine that turns thoughts into reality. So a reality warping weapon. Like Franklin Richards but not of child form, but shiny chrome.

I'm kind of getting over just laying out what happens bit by bit so i'll try keep it simpler.

The JLA Watchtower is breached with Justifier Green Arrow and Justifier Black Lightning leading the charge.

The battle of Bludhaven rages with the rag tag team of heroes seeming to get the upper hand. The coolest thing. Tawny Tiger versus Kalibak. Supergirl vs Mary Marvel. Also, congratulations, Mary Marvel is Desaad. Kalibak wants to kill Tawny, Tawny tells him to not let his cultured nature deceive him as "tawny bites". Kalibak proceeds to beat Tawny's head in***(very sad). Freddy Freeman now 'Shazam' knows how to defeat Mary Marvel, grab her and say the word. Tawny Tiger almost dead, rips out Kalibak's guts. Brutal. Kalibak wants help from his Tiger warriors but they only follow the strong and bow down to Tawny. Mary Marvel and Freddy are back to normal(her even with her normal hair etc), Mary purged of Desaad but traumatized, never wanting to say the word again, all Freddy can do is comfort her. With the heroes victorious and the bridge secured. They feel the second wave coming.

At Checkmate headquarters, Mister Miracle explains how the 'circuit'/painting over their faces and that Anthro first painted. Is a letter from the alphabet of the New Gods and means "freedom from restriction", it protects against Anti-Life. With Checkmate down, Mister Terrific explains the endgame. The plan if the superheroes failed and hope was lost(this you gotta listen to).

The second wave ends up being the new Furies.

The japanese heroes talk with low self esteem how none of them have been in a fight. Miracle says that Motherboxxx says Sunny sumo is from a 'lateral reality', somehow Sumo went back in time and then possesed this Sumo's body or something.

So at the Watchtower with the good guys down, Black Canary tries to get some sense into Ollie. Tattoo Man has none of this and suddenly becomes a hero and activates the circuit as they put the helmet on. Turns out it disrupts the other helmets, jams them. An Antidote so to speak to Anti life. However even without the helmets, Ollie and Black Lightning are still infected, infact it seems they think Anti-life is easier. Commentary about ignorance making life easier?

So this is where it all makes sense. How will this change the DCU? How does the multiverse play into it? Answer - Checkmate: Omega. The final intiative that Mister Terrific talks about. In one room, psychics try to cleanse people of anti life, in another - the big gun mystics (zatanna etc) try to contact the spectre for help(how fucking awesome would that be as a good guy ace in the hole). Basically with both Atoms at the front, they will all go into another reality. Renee Montoya is introduced to LORD EYE. Some super duper version of Brother Eye. Basically he and the Atoms will begin a fall into another universe where they will establish the remants of this world into the new one. With Renee leading a Global Peace Agency that controls the new world. So now it makes sense. They don't say it but....Earth 1. That will be the new home of the DC Earth, it leaves this continuity fucked one in shambles, perfect for that supposed last panel of Kamandi. Now this is a great idea and "Crisis" worthy. However there is a problem with this as I will note later.

At the Secret Society, Sivana and Luthor team up, realizing that this is fucked. They both like life. Sivana is pissed that his daughter was given to Anti Life in front of him. Luthor likes life even with it's ups and downs. They plan a sabotage. Sivana says the helmets are mad hatter design and he easily converted his watch to a signal jammer. Luthor mentions they stupidly powered his suit for this "final battle with the superheroes". Massive mistake. Libra confronts Luthor knowing it was him. Luthor's words "impress me Sivana". The Justifiers go down. Luthor tells Libra "I'll show you balance" and blasts him, but there is no body. Sivana mentions it's a classic "haven't heard the last of him". Sivana says that they'll hear his voice as the voice of Darkseid. Though I don't know what they're talking about because they don't show it.

With the flashes, Jay Garrick included, Barry talks about science, light, space, time. How it all becomes one. That beyond the superluminal barrier, matter converts to pure information and he was sent back from that barrier knowing how to stop Darkseid. But he needs Wally's help and they need to outrun the Black Racer whilst at the same time trying to get through the light to get to Darkseid. They are the only ones fast enough to do it. Apparently the Black Racer is also the Black Flash.


Now what you've been waiting for. The Fate of The Dark Knight. ------ Do not read if you do not wish to know the fate.

Batman confronts Darkseid in his chamber. Darkseid knows he's there, he wondered when he would show himself. He tells Batman that he should just accept that the Equation is proven...To embrace it. Batman is carrying the Soul killing gun from the Last Rites issues when he was captured by Mokkari and Mister Simyan. He tells Darkseid he shouldn't have killed Orion. Darkseid mentions it was Orion's destiny to fall in the final battle. All the while those crazy light images from Seven Soldiers of Victory( the ones JH Williams III drew) is around Darkseid. Batman tells Darkseid that on the way to killing Orion, he was wounded beyond repair. "A rotten carcass of a god, crawling into the sewer to die".

"I made a very solemn vow about Firearms." "But for you, i'm making a once in a lifetime exception. A gun and a bullet, Darkseid. It was your idea". - The Batman

The bullet is laced with Radion, which all you who have read New Gods comics over the years know is toxic to the gods of the Fourth World and Fifth it seems.

The bullet is the one that killed Orion.

"Little Man." "Can you outrace the omega sanction? The death that is life!" - Darkseid

"Try me." - The Batman

He fires the bullet, Darkseid unleashes the Omega Sanction(now purple). Darkseid is hit near his heart. Kirby dots coming out of his wound.

Batman either accepting his fate or unaware smiles and says his final word "Gotcha." As the Omega Sanction hits him. In the chest and in the head.

Around the world, people go quiet. The Black Gambit/Omega intiative is...initiated. The Green Lanterns can't, no matter how hard they try, get to Earth. Hal says that no matter what, that they'll die trying and they won't abandon their people.

Nix Uotan tells Metron(yes the rubik's cube dude) that he can't coordinate this. That he was exiled to this darkness with these "germ-people" for a reason. Metron siting in his chair, holding the Rubik's cube in an epic white glow tells him that his arrival inaugurates the Fifth World. "The Age of Men as Gods" and that if they breach the bleed wall, they will face a greater menace than Darkseid. (obviously Mandrakk the Dark Monitor). The stuff Metron says is GRAND. I like the way Nix is insecure and Metron does seem like an actual God, appearing to a lesser being, but this being is still big. So what does Metron mean? Well it means that maybe Mandrakk will destroy everything barring Earth 1. But how weird that Darkseid is dead already. or maybe not. Nah no way. He still has to fight Superman doesn't he? And the Age of Men as Gods? Damn, I still wish that epic idea of having all the big guns become true Gods and the sidekicks take over was still in play. But maybe this is the direction Morrison started back in JLA, that the mythic big guns of the DCU are Gods.

Around the world everything goes quiet, the sky bleeds harder, it gets closer to the ground. As the silence goes around, the Fury Wonder Woman yells "Look! Up in the sky..."

Everyone looks up.

Superman is back, destroying everything in his path with Heat Vision(should of been more epic), it cuts straight to him in a panel destroying everything. It should have been a double page epic splash of him returning. Ahhhh....

Anyway Superman is in a rage, destroying everything in his path, a path that leads to Darkseid. The furies are FUCKED. He flies through everything. There is no fighting, he is just flyign towards something in anger. The Furies and the hunger dogs just seem to fly into the air as Superman flies through them. Superman keeps breaking everything down with force and heat vision. A long shot of a destroyed city and it going dark. The world is collapsing into it. The sky is literally falling.

On the Bridge to Bludhaven, the heroes accept their fate. It is the end of the world. The heroes look up and the red skies, lightning and multitude of earths surround them.

Superman comes out of the rubble. Holding the burnt out lifeless body of The Batman.

The Batman is dead.


+ I have pictures if you want to see of the final page and maybe I also have Batman vs Darkseid.

To the issue. I quite liked it, towards the end it got more epic and exciting. But there's one more issue left. How do you end it all? Mandrakk hasn't even showed up yet. Darkseid hasn't done anything. So far it's all been talk of grand ideas but little execution. The art isn't epic enough, the scope of earths isn't that big. It just seems like another JLA adventure. The panel that cuts to Superman fucking everything up, the whole thing should of been well handled. And yes with the final page of Superman holding Batman's body. Doug Mahnke should of definitely drawn the whole mini series. Much respect to Doug Mahnke for that final page, doesn't make sense in context how his fate ends up bt a well drawn Iconic page.

Good ideas, ok no, Great ideas. Epic talk. Epic scope in ideas. But sadly not that huge. I would love to talk to Grant Morrison and see what his original concept was, what he was actually thinking of.

Also some solicit bullshit. Darkseid doesn't fight Superman. Darkseid doesn't even wear a shirt in this issue. He wears jeans! Mandrakk doesn't appear. Yeah. Liars. Where is Aquaman fighting the deep six?

Batman R.I.P....What the fuck did that have to do with anything? Nothing. It was a story which makes no sense in context, because you don't even have to read it to go straight into Final Crisis, there is no connection. All I feel is my wallet strangled. Unless it was a bunch of issues made so there is something after Final Crisis. Lame, uninspired, deceptive.

Either way it was a good read, and even though poetically, it would of been nice to see Batman meet his end fighting crime in his own book. This is a decent ending, though I wish it was clear he accepted his fate when hit by the Omega Sanction. In some way I think Batman may return, or moreso Bruce Wayne return in Issue #7 somehow. Or I still have hope that it is all saved with the Silver Age heroes of Earth 1 coming to save New Earth. Which by the looks of it is broken and can't be repaired. Batman truly is a mythic hero, killing Darkseid pretty much, breaking his one rule to save the multiverse.

The scope just isn't that big. Alex Luthor and Superboy Prime trying to restart the universe was HUGE. Superboy Prime basically taking on the DCU was massive. This...nothing. Evil gods manifesting and dying. Darkseid wearing jeans for fucks sake and then getting shot by Batman....not very epic. I don't get it though, in the previous issue, Darkseid was mobile and had his costume on. This time it's as if he still hasn't left the chair.

I can't wait to see how DarkDidio ruins The Blackest Night. ****

Also please address this rumor that Jim Lee will be drawing the opening One-Shot of The Blackest Night. Like Ethan Van-Sciver did with Sinestro Corps War.

*How does it keep going on? That dumb cunt DarkDidio being typical corporate shite. They failed to promote Sinestro Corps War, then they realized it may very well be the greatest superhero story ever but it was too late. Now in hindsight they realize it, so how do they fix it? milking it of course. The event was called "Green Lantern: The Blackest Night" but no, DarkDidio ruler of Apokalips saw $$$ and decided it needed to be a company wide event so now it's "The Blackest Night". No matter that now it won't be Green Lantern centric with Hal, Kyle, John and Guy the main heroes. Fucking hell the stuff this guy does makes me sick. What a cunt. And he wonders why Marvel always beats DC. Wake the fuck up cockhead.

** The 4th pip once epicly said "and what Marvel is doing with Captain America, Iron Fist and Daredevil is just what DC did with Reign of the Superman, Azrael and Kyle Rayner" - What a lost cunt. Cap, Iron Fist and Daredevil are 3 of the best comics you may ever read. Yeah i'm talking about the Ed Brubaker, Brubaker/Fraction and Bendis, Brubaker runs.

*** I like Tawny.

**** I'm disappointed to know that DarkDidio WILL ruin The Blackest Night. It's the comic event EVERYONE is looking forward to. And he knows it now. Before he had his head stuck up his ass with the crap they were putting out (Amazon's Attack! What the fuck was that!) that he completely overlooked Sinestro Corps War, which is even in respect to Watchmen. The Greatest Superhero Story ever. The best Star Wars story since Empire Strikes Back. Never before have I read something so exciting since I read The Lord of the Rings. Then people went fucking ballistic when that cinematic teaser was shown at the end of the book promoting "GREEN LANTERN - THE BLACKEST NIGHT" not "DC - THE BLACKEST NIGHT", Geoff Johns himself said he saw it as Return of the Jedi in the Green Lantern trilogy, but due to being a girly man, Darkdidio will turn this into a DC event and ruin it. No more having the Green Lanterns and it's mythology as the focus, but bringing as many company wide characters nobody gives a shit about as Black lanterns so they can have spin off series which no one will buy. This pure corporate bullshit where there is not even an attempt in any form to make art makes me mad. Final Crisis - Rage of the Red Lanterns? What did that have to do with Final Crisis. Nothing. But it has the tag and it sells more. That's the dark one's idea of selling books. Lying, deceiving. How about some good stories. Marvel is corporate too but they also at least give a shit or else there wouldn't be any Captain America, Immortal Iron Fist, Daredevil. Comics that are good because that's the reason they exist. Good stories. Fucking corporate cunt.

I'm off to see Kickboxer 2.

Batman R.I.P (Click to emlargin)

"I'm going to fuck you up." "But i'm the Goddamn Darkseid."

"If it bleeds, we can kill it."

"this iz teh same page. But now there iz 2 of them LOL!!!!1111111."

Batman brought the funk to Disco Fridays at the local club.

The Dark Knight no more.

Slightly better pic but stamped.

The Monaliesel.

Robocop on a Car with four legs.
Scene from 2 Easter 2 Island.